7th Heaven
High Anxiety

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High Anxiety

Back at the CamPound, RevCam is trying to explain to Patricia about why he took a break from the church. The explanation doesn't make much sense, and the whole "RevCam crisis of faith" storyline is just as boring when Morgan's in the middle of it. Which is why it should come as no surprise when I tell you that a scene where Annie tries to counsel Morgan is so dull that it's not even worth discussing.

Lucy has tracked down Kevin at the police station because she needs to talk to him. She realizes her timing is bad, and she's apologetic about that. Besides, Roxanne is nowhere to be seen, and she's already told the T-1000 to leave her alone. Thus, you would think Kevin could spare a few moments to talk to his fiancee, right? Wrong. The T-1000 is as much an asshole as ever while he refuses to talk to Lucy. So she passive-aggressively tells him that her problems can wait until later but that she just wanted to tell him she quit school. Then she flounces off. Kevin just stands there, sporting the same stupid facial expression he usually wears. Whoever should have yelled "cut" must have drifted off for a bit.

Simon and Asslee are making out in the movie theater while a bunch of little kids watch them. Really, kids, it's not that exciting. Trust me. The usher comes up and asks Simon and Asslee to leave. He pretty much sums up everything when he disgustedly asks, "Can't you find a better place to make out than a Sammy the Squirrel movie?" The revolting lovebirds try to argue that they're just watching the movie, but the usher, unlike the vast majority of Glenoak residents, is not stupid. Simon and Asslee leave.

Elsewhere on the Promenade, Ruthie walks up to Ben. She's got an attractive brunette named Jill in tow. Ruthie performs the introductions like a personals ad, helpfully filling us in on important facts like Jill's favorite color (blue) and her taste in meat (burgers, not steaks). She even asks Ben to take his shirt off so that Jill can see his chest. Before she can get around to inviting Ben to examine Jill's teeth, Jill asks, "Are we on camera or something?" When Ben replies in the negative, Jill asks, "So, what, you two are just weirdos?" Ha! What's even funnier is that while Jill runs away, calling for "security," Ruthie just stands there, smiling psychotically at Ben.

The CamRents have ditched the Hamiltons again for one of their special kitchen chats. Discouraged by their lack of success in saving the Hamilton marriage, Annie announces that she has a "nutty" plan. I believe that "nutty" is sitcom-speak for "incredibly retarded."

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7th Heaven




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