RevCam has made it to the ER, and we find out through exposition dialogue that Nurse Ratched has an ulcer, but will be okay. "I'm quitting my job and moving here," says Melissa, who just doesn't get it. A doctor comes out and says that they're keeping Nurse Ratched overnight, but Melissa can see her now. Melissa asks RevCam to come in with her, because the emotional bond between these relative strangers is just that strong. They go in, and there is Nurse Ratched, who announces that she has made up her mind to sell the house and buy a condo. And what better time to make these important life decisions than when high on prescription painkillers? Melissa has an announcement too: she's going to fire Nurse Ratched's help, quit her job, and move in with her mom to take care of her. "Congratulations on leaving your job!" says Nurse Ratched, and I still don't understand what Melissa's feelings about her job has to do with anything.
Nurse Ratched says that she and Melissa would hate living together. Melissa says that doesn't matter because she has to take care of her mother. "Well, that is so pathetic," says Nurse Ratched, as Louise Fletcher suddenly realizes that some things just aren't worth the money. Nurse Ratched says she taught Melissa to take care of herself, just like her mother taught her to take care of herself, which is what she intends to do. As for Melissa, she should get a better job and travel around the world, and, of course, "start a family." "With who?" asks Melissa. "'Whom,'" corrects Nurse Ratched. That right there would be enough for me to be okay with walking out of this woman's life. Nurse Ratched adds that if Melissa doesn't find the right man, she can always do what she and Melissa's dad did: adopt. "You never mentioned " RevCam starts, and it would have been hilarious if Melissa didn't know she was adopted until just now. But, no. Melissa gets in a good line when she snaps a "What does it matter?" in response. We learn that the reason why Melissa is so obsessed with taking care of her mother is because she is so grateful to her for adopting her. Whatever. Nurse Ratched says repayment isn't necessary, and Melissa's constant worry stressed her out so much that she got an ulcer. Way to blame, Mom. I'm just pissed that a golden opportunity for RevCam to tell us about Ruthie's adoption has yet again been missed.