7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Cate: F | Grade It Now!

Lucy's still moping around the house. She stops into Eric's office to tell him that she apologized to Elaina, who is now out with Mike. RevCam lets Lucy know that it's all right to forgive herself and let the healing begin. Because it is a man giving her this advice, she will follow it. She asks him if she will ever find a boyfriend. He tells her she will, but probably when she least expects it. She says she would like a guy with whom to share all the fun things ahead: "Valentine's, Senior Prom, graduation." I can understand wanting a significant other for two of those events, but why would you need one for graduation? RevCam points out that Lucy already has a full life, with or without a man. He also says that any guy she ends up with will be the "luckiest guy in the world." It's a pretty nice scene, actually, marred only by the knowledge that RevCam has two other daughters. What about their guys? Will Ruthie's guy be in the fiftieth percentile? What about Mary's guy? Would it be unfair to assume that he will be the unluckiest man in the world?

Down at the ice-cream parlour, Mike and Elaina discuss their future children. A case is made for having dozens of them. Well, duh, it's not like birth control exists in the 7th Heaven universe. Mike asks Elaina if she wants a drink. She answers this as if it were a daring question, crying out with reckless abandon, "Why not!" She can try all she wants to charm us with her vivacious acceptance of soft-drink offers, but I still hope she and Mike never show up on this program again, ever. Begone, losers.

Lucy answers the front door at the CamPound to find the hunky soap-opera dude who will be playing her new love interest, Jeremy, a.k.a. the friend Mike wanted to set her up with. He babbles nervously while she just stares vacantly at him. Finally she gets it together enough to ask him in. He tells Lucy she's really pretty. I wonder if he's ever seen David Cross's performance as Slow Donnie on Just Shoot Me. Lucy offers to make some cocoa, and Jeremy has to pretend to be enthralled. RevCam has been creepily spying on them from his office. We all know what a turn-on that is for Stalker Eric. As Lucy and Jeremy walk off, Eric retreats into his office. I guess it's time for him to, you know, take care of a little business of his own, for a change.

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7th Heaven




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