7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C- | 439 USERS: B-
YOU GRADE IT
Let's Not, and Say We Did

Matt walks by the Duo of Dumb, listening to some music on his headphones and lamely half-dancing along to it. Upon seeing his sisters, he turns the music off and asks what's going on. From their vague responses to his query, Matt is somehow able to deduce that they were just talking about sex. He can "see it" in their faces. Well, again, if he thought he knew the answer, why did he even ask? Stop wasting my time, Camdens! Mary says that Matt just has sex on his mind because he's trying to think of an idea for his upcoming human sexuality class project. Oh, and Matt? Taking a class on human sexuality does not count as having sex. Because I know that's why you took the course, so I just want you to be fully informed before drop/add period ends. Figuring that it's always a good time to remind the little ladies to remain chaste, Matt tells his sisters not to have sex. "That means you, Mary," he says, even though Mary's single and Lucy's the one with the serious boyfriend. The guitar strums merrily as if brothers telling their younger sisters not to have sex is normal and not creepy at all.

The shot of RevCam hugging Lucy in the opening credits would be so much sweeter if I didn't see the episode it was from and thus know that he was hugging her because she just got her period.

The Opening Credits Timewaster consists of female hands picking up car seats with ugly baby dolls in them. Not to worry, fans of racial segregation -- the white women take the white dolls and the black woman takes the black doll. No interracial marriages implied here! Three pregnant women stand in a very tight circle and pat each other's bellies, like, do pregnant women actually do that? I tried to ask my mom, who was watching the show with me and has first-hand experience, but this show had already bored her to death so she couldn't respond. Pregnant women and their partners sit on blankets and put diapers on the baby dolls. Some of the birthing-team pairs consist of two women, but I doubt that this is any sort of reference to homosexual relationships, since, again, this is 7th Heaven we're talking about and any homosexual couples who lived in Glenoak would have been run out of town by RevCam and the Glenoak police force long ago.

7th Heaven

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