7th Heaven
Life And Death, Part I

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Simon's on the phone, with his legs slung up on his desk. Wow, he looks taller. Why is it that all these kids keep on growing up, but so few of them leave the house? There's a knock on his door; Ruthie barges in and asks that he get off the phone, since he's "not the only person in this house with a life." I'd say the number of people in that house with no life are tied with the people that have lives. And the ones that lives still don't have much to speak of. Simon waves Ruthie out of his room with an annoyed grunt, then gets back to arguing with Cecilia. She wouldn't mind hanging up, but for the plot's sake, we have to get the gist of their fight. It's about prom. No, Blaine, what about prom. No! What! About! Prom! Just say it! Say it! I want to hear you say it! Simon invited someone else and forgot about it, and now he can't take Cecilia. Just kidding. Cecilia doesn't want to go, because it's "a big waste of money, mostly [her] money, since the big expense is a dress." She doesn't want to buy a dress to wear just one time. Then don't buy a foofy, ugly dress. A prom dress is not like a bridesmaid's dress. Cecilia, two words: Thrift store. Two more: Sale rack. Still, skipping prom is fine with me. I went, and in hindsight, I could have skipped it. I went to a lot of high school dances and had fun at them all, but prom was a lot more loaded with significance, and therefore I felt the pressure going in. Who needs that? Simon offers to pay for all of it. Is that why you're pushing a mop around, dude? To pay for a stupid dance? Cecilia says that would be "stupid" of him to do that. Word. Ruthie bursts in, grabs the phone, and yells into it that she needs to make a phone call. Cecilia shrugs, and Ruthie hangs up fiercely then flounces out.

Simon rushes out of his room to clobber Ruthie, and literally runs into Lucy, who has Xtina in tow with her roll-y-poly suitcase. Lucy calls her "a friend from school," ha ha, and says she'll be staying there for a few days. Simon excuses himself to "go kill someone," and Xtina looks after him lasciviously. "Cuuute," she says to Lucy. Lucy is all, "More like rude!" Xtina gives him a little look over her shoulder, then flounces off.

The camera angle is all tilt-y as Simon yells at Ruthie, "Who do you think you are slamming down the phone like that!" ["Oh, because the Camdens never just hang up without saying goodbye. Oh, wait. They do that ALL THE FREAKIN' TIME. I hate this goddamn show." -- Sars] Ruthie says she's someone who needed to make a phone call, now it's been made, and he can "have [his] stupid phone back." Simon asks theoretically if it isn't a rule that they're supposed to respect each other in this house. She says no one respects her. "No one even pretends to!" She locks herself in the bathroom. Simon, somehow softened by this stupid tirade, knocks and says, "Hey, it's me. Simon, your favorite sibling." Ruthie is all, "GO AWAY!" Simon continues to negotiate; after all, they "share a room." They DO? What the fuck? They share a room, and Lucy is bringing home another person? Simon says he "can't take" both Cecilia and Ruthie not talking to him. What a pussy. Peter wanders up, and he also looks taller than last week. His hair is combed differently too. He asks casually, "Ruthie here?" Yes, she's locked in the bathroom, totally ragging out. Simon says if Peter "ever does anything to hurt [Ruthie], [he'll] find out about it, and [he] know[s] where [Peter] live[s]." Oh, is that a threat with abusive undertones? I thought we learned last week that that isn't cool? Peter just says, "Okay." Simon wheels off, and Peter says through the door, "He's gone." Ruthie emerges, and Peter asks if she's been crying. She asks if it looks like she's been crying, and goggles her eyes at him crazily. He says yeah, and she says, "So what! Stop looking at me!" He turns around complacently and stares in the opposite direction. Ruthie folds her arms and fumes.

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7th Heaven




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