7th Heaven
Life And Death, Part I

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Kevin hops into the unfinished attic, or basement, or whatever it is, and rouses his sleeping wife. They smooch, and provide a little backstory/re-exposition for those of you out of the room when it happened the first time. So thoughtful! Brenda, you shouldn't have. Chandler and Eric finally connected re: Chandler's dad, but Kevin didn't stick around to find out how it went. Lucy scolds him, "If you ever want to make detective, you're going to have to get a whole lot nosier." And he knows about Xtina dating Mike but "doesn't really care," and knows something is up with Roxanne and Chandler. The phone rings, and it's Mary. She's "lousy," and has "done something really really stupid." And where's Eric? Lucy guesses at Barry's. Mary hangs up with a "don't tell Mom!"

Morning. Annie yells at Eric, saying she "didn't sleep all night." Barry never told Eric about the baby; some nurse did. Annie thinks it's all "odd." Annie says that she'll call Sarah and "hint around," because she wants "to know know." Eric says that Andrew was a "sweet man." Whatever! We want to know about the babies. Simon comes down and says he's figured out a "compromise" for prom. Does it have to do with a certain houseguest?

CamPound yard. Ruthie is stretched out on a chaise when Peter walks up and says he wants to talk. They have the most awkward, artificial conversation ever. EV. ER. Ruthie calls the confrontation "awkward," and Peter says, "It's life, honey. There's nothing awkward about it." 'Cause he and his mom "talk about everything, even this stuff. Can I get you anything? Do anything for you?" Ruthie looks pinched and squinty.

Whitebread Urban Hospital. I've got a Code...oh, forget it. A Code Forget It. Barry is all scrubbed up and ready for rushing when his wife walks up behind him. They go into their broom closet, where they have all their best conversations, and he goes, "So?" Sew buttons, she got her period! Though all she says is that she doesn't have to see the doctor, because "this morning..." Hey, Brenda? They can say "bitch" in primetime now. They show bare asses. Women's and men's. You can say "period." For the love of all mankind, just say it. Barry says that in a few years they can breed. She's all, that isn't what you said yesterday! Hey, Barry can change his tune. And hey, now it makes it that much more fun that Eric didn't specify which one of his million children is preggers! Oh wait, he did. Anyway, Barry and Sarah get in a fight; she wants to go to Florida for a few days to see her family. He says he might go home to see his family, and was she going to go to Florida if she were pregnant? Would she tell her family when he wasn't around? He wants to be there! She says that they have to "say what they mean and mean what they say when they communicate." He says he's glad he works and goes to school so she can sit around "reading Oprah. That is a quote from Doctor Phil, isn't it?" Wow, I hate this show. She asks if he's so busy, how comes he knows from reading Oprah. You know, since Oprah is such a huge fucking industry, why don't they just skip the pretense of verbs? Reading, watching, whatever -- it's from the book of Oprah and everyone knows it when they hear it. She says he "hangs out in the nurse's station reading Oprah with them instead of with me." The groove-busting doctor opens the door, and Sarah leaves. Asshat Doctor says, "It's so clichéd, the supply room. Why don't you try the bedroom." Why don't you try easing up, Asshat Doctor.

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7th Heaven

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