7th Heaven
Life Is Too Beautiful

Episode Report Card
Mr. Stupidhead: D | Grade It Now!
Life Is Too Beautiful

In the hallway, Ruthie bumps into Simon and announces, "I can't take anymore of this happiness. I want Dad to go back to normal so that I can sleep." Simon: "Eventually things will go back to normal, but until then, I'm the man of the house. Now, did you do your homework?" At this, Ruthie shoots Simon a death glare. Simon: "I just want to check your homework like Dad would if he weren't supposed to be resting." Simon, don't be such a butthole. And Ruthie...oh, forget it.

Simon finds his way to the kitchen, where RevCam and SuperMom are feeding the twins. Simon tells RevCam that he'll finish feeding the babies, because RevCam is supposed to be meditating. RevCam tells Simon that he'll do it later, when it will be quieter around the house. Simon tells him that the "challenge" of meditation is to do it when it's noisy, and if noise is Eric's excuse, he'll never get around to doing it. RevCam sees his point and leaves, as I would, but only because if I had to look at Simon's whining mug any longer, I'd probably end up bending him backwards and chafing his ass with his own hair. Oops -- did I say that?

Up to the Dynamic Duo, getting ready to go to school. Lucy: "Did you get your math quiz signed?" Mary: "No, but I'm going to ask Dad right now." Lucy: "Wait. We're not supposed to upset him. Why don't you just ask Mom?" Mary: "Because right now, Dad is unupsetable [sic]." Lucy: "But should you be taking advantage of his...his...his..." Mary: "His post-heart-attack insanity?" Lucy: "If you want to call it that." Mary: "Well, Mom said it wouldn't last, so we might as well enjoy it while it's here. Wanna come?" Lucy: "Why not. Even if it is post-heart-attack insanity, he's still Dad, and you're still you, so this should be fun." Yeah. Fun. Maybe after a fifth of Stoli.

To the RevCave, where RevCam is sitting in the lotus position and breathing slowly. Lucy and Mary enter, and Mary shows RevCam her test, which has clearly gotten a low mark. RevCam gives a minor speech about Mary's interests and achievements, the irrelevance of trigonometry, and the socio-political effects of free market economy, and ends with, "Life is deeper, more meaningful, and more complex than you can imagine. Now, if I let you off with just signing this test and not telling you how important you are to me, how important it is for you to have good grades and more importantly, a good mind, then I would be missing out on some kind of parental bliss." "Parental bliss"? Oh, man. I hate to say it, but shut up, RevCam. You're getting annoying.

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7th Heaven




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