Mary and Lucy answer the door to reveal...Kyle, and what appears to be his twin brother. Aw, they're wearing cute little suits and they brought matching bouquets of flowers! Lucy and Mary are totally bummed that their dates are little boys. Simon laughs as a Blues Guitar Of Whoops! I Think We Just Broke The Statutory Rape Law plays.
After the commercial, RevCam frets about the state of his oldest son's virginity while Annie says, "Stop worrying! We spent the whole afternoon with Connie. If she's really what Lucy says she is then they ought to give her an Oscar, because all I saw was a shy, nervous, scared girl. She's not a -- she's just -- she's just Connie!" As if the fact that Annie now knows that Connie sleeps around means that Connie must also satisfy her preconceived ideas of what whores are like. And now RevCam and Annie reveal what horrible people they really are when they talk about Eric's ex-girlfriend, who apparently came over during the commercial break. He says he remembers that he broke up with her because of her "baby-talk." Then he launches into an impression of her that sounds less like "baby-talk" than it does "unfortunate woman with a speech impediment who you'd think a Man of God wouldn't be picking on behind her back." Annie tells him to "gwab the pizza! Wet's go!" They laugh and laugh like the jerks they are as they walk to the dining room.
And finally, we get to see Snappy. Besides having that speech impediment, the lady who plays Snappy seems to also have been stricken with a compulsion to always wear her ginormous Snappy costume. This is the only explanation I can think of for why she wears that impractical and bulky thing for the rest of the show. She asks Ruthie what she learned today. "Question authority," Ruthie responds brattily. Girl doesn't know that Santa Claus is fake, but she knows the word "authority"? How consistent. Snappy takes off her dinosaur head and tosses it behind her when the pizza comes, proclaiming pizza to be a "Snappy good time!" Then she says they should all say a blessing first, to which Ruthie asks, "To who?" Annie, RevCam, and Snappy are crestfallen. Blessing finished, Simon decides to ruin everyone's appetite by saying that after dinner, maybe Kyle can show everyone his one chest hair. Lucy looks upset, probably because her date isn't the one with the chest hair.