7th Heaven
Lip Service

Episode Report Card
Cate: C- | 2 USERS: C+
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Lip Service

Mary and Robbie are still watching the hockey game when the phone rings. Mary seductively reaches across Robbie to answer it, almost thrusting her breasts in his face while doing so. It's Lucy calling to bitch her out for faking sickness to stay home with Robbie. For Robbie's benefit, Mary pretends it's a telemarketer on the line. I wonder who's more annoying, Lucy or a telemarketer. Normally I'd say the telemarketer, but Lucy's pretty bad tonight. After Robbie leaves to check on the twins, Mary displays one of those rare moments of funny bitchiness that make me temporarily like her. She torments Lucy by suggesting that she and Robbie have been spending the evening slow-dancing. That news makes Lucy's eyes go all buggy in a colossal bit of overacting. Mary hangs up on her ass without even saying goodbye, though in this case I think she's justified. Robbie spoils Mary's seduction plans by bringing down the twins to "hang out" with them.

Morris is trying to undo some of the damage he's done to his reputation as a human being with a brain. I'm afraid he does not succeed, but his next speech is so funny that I'm going to reproduce it in its entirety. He smugly says, "I'm only half-Jewish but I still follow many of the precepts of Judaism. For example, at a ballgame, I always order the kosher hot dog. Okay, it's usually more expensive, but what's a quarter to help support your religion, huh?" Ha! Poor Morris. So hot, and yet so stupid. As soon as Lucy comes back to the table, Simon asks if he and Morris can use the phone next. Damn, those Camdens are rude. When Simon and Morris leave the room, everyone else stares uncomfortably at each for a while.

Simon takes Morris into the study to berate him for not knowing enough about Judaism. Morris looks utterly crestfallen. When Simon tells him, "You're supposed to be a good example of mixed marriages," Morris sadly says, "I didn't know I was here as some kind of exhibit," and walks out of the room. This scene totally makes them seem like a couple.

Back in the dining room, Dopey is trying to justify getting married, but RevCam's not having any of it. When Eric tries to enlist Rabbi Richard's help in protesting the union, Richard goes off on some bizarre tangent about how his wife looks in Manolo Blahniks and how he loves to read Oprah's magazine. Fortunately for us, Dopey cuts him off to extol the advantages of him and PC marrying. He talks about how hard medical school is, but I miss most of the rest of what he says because I'm laughing real hard, as I always do, whenever Dopey mentions medical school. Richard tries to lighten the mood some more by joking about how his daughter used to have trouble with high school algebra. He says some other peculiar thing about how she used to break out with "isosceles triangles" all over her face. Is that supposed to be a joke? Or is Richard just rapidly losing his mind and we're getting to witness it firsthand? RevCam compliments Rabbi Richard on his ability to take the whole kids-marrying thing in stride. Richard admits that at first he and Rosina were "thrown" by the idea, but now that the idea of religious conversion has been suggested, they're a lot happier. Like a dork, RevCam automatically assumes that it is Sarah who would be converting, and he beams happily. Talk about arrogant. His smile fades, though, when Dopey mentions that the person planning to convert is not PC.

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7th Heaven

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