7th Heaven
Little White Lies, Part I

Episode Report Card
Sara M: C- | Grade It Now!
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Tell Me Lies, Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

On the plane, the captain is apologizing for the mechanical delay and saying that they should be taking off "in about forty-five minutes." At this point, I would have gotten right off that plane. Not because of the delay, but because of the mechanical problem that caused it. I want my planes to be in tip-top flying condition, or at least to have the illusion of it. Matt signs the pilot's news to Heather, and they chat. They're glad to see each other. Heather inquires as to PC's location, and Matt says she's staying in New York for the summer. "That's too bad," Heather says, totally not meaning it at all. Matt goes on and on about how great being married is and what a great marriage he has. Heather says that she, too is happy. She loves being married, too. "Nuts?" Matt offers. Ew.

Carlos runs around the hospital like a pollo with its head cut off. PC is there, too, and she calls out to him. I wonder if Mary and Carlos and PC and Matt get together for dinner sometimes when Mary isn't regretting getting married and PC and Matt aren't separated. PC asks Carlos if Mary's here, the camera shooting her from the shoulders up so as to cleverly mask Sarah Danielle Madison's pregnancy. Carlos says Mary is here, but he can't find her. Apparently, she thought she was in labor, but actually wasn't, and now she's missing. Women are so stupid, and pregnant women are stupid AND crazy! PC volunteers to help Carlos find her. Where's Dr. Assbeard to yell at PC for slacking off? Carlos is hesitant to accept PC's offer of help, because Mary has ordered that no one in her family be involved in her pregnancy. Who knew that Mary would end up being the smart Camden? Who knew there would even be a smart Camden?

Roxanne and Captain Michaels are talking about we know not what. The only clue is that "there's a test involved" in whatever Roxanne is undertaking. I still think it could be sex; it wouldn't surprise me at all if Glenoak had an ordinance that you had to take a qualifying exam in order to have sex. Roxanne and Capt. Michaels hug and part ways. Would I watch a spin-off series starring Roxanne and Capt. Michaels as two cops who don't always play by the rules? Yes. Yes, I would. Officer Crewmember'sSon spies on the action, then stares around blankly in a futile attempt to show an emotion. I think Officer Crewmember'sSon may be RevCam and Annie's long-lost child. Maybe this will be one of the "lies" this episode was supposed to be about.

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7th Heaven

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