7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Gwen: D | 416 USERS: C+
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Losers

Annie shows up at the pool hall and finds her husband sitting at a tiny table with more food, as if he didn't just almost have a hot five-way with the skanky pool bunnies. Eric and Annie admit that they're each a tiny bit jealous of the other, and that it's nice to get the mack action from people stupid enough to find them attractive. In fact, Annie actually says, "I was maybe flirting a little, too, in an I'm-a-wife, mother-of-seven-children-but-it-still-boosts-my-ego-when-another-man-finds-me-attractive sort of way." I'm not even going to make fun of that, because I know where she's coming from. Maybe if I lose some weight, put on some iridescent eye shadow, get two degrees, and have four more kids, guys will want to buy me lasagna. Hell, who am I kidding? I'd be happy if I could get single straight guys to look me in the eye while being introduced to me at parties.

Annie tells Eric she's anxious to get to bed. It takes him a while to realize that she's coming on to him. That's nice, I suppose, but I hope it takes place completely off screen.

Matt's still dancing with the girl in red. Looking into her eyes makes him remember that he was supposed to drive Simon to the movies. He pulls a Cinderella, telling her to call him, and runs out the door. She chases him, saying, "Matt! I don't have your number." "You don't have my number? How could I not give you my number?" he asks, and then starts kissing her audibly. Damn, that's smooth. Right then, his parents emerge from the pool hall, which happens to be right next door. He sees them, makes his goofy face, and then writes his number on the napkin Mystery Girl is holding. She takes off right before the CamRents accost Matt. He tells them he'll go to the CamPound posthaste to apologize to Simon. They ask him to check up on the kids. He asks where they'll be, then thinks the better of it and drives away. The CamRents decide to get a room. Annie moans and they smoosh their foreheads together. Gack.

7th Heaven

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