Damn, it's Chickenhead. I'd hoped she was gone for good. She's walking down the hall to her apartment while Brett stalks her, trying to get her to admit she loves him. The dialogue isn't even worthy of an old romance novel; it would feel perfectly at home, though, in some of the romantic stories I attempted to write when I was a pre-teen drama princess. When Cluckie refuses to admit she loves Brett, he very manfully kisses her into submission. Swoon!
In the CamKitchen, Lucy and SuperMom continue their completely irritating debate over who is Lucy's true love. It's filler, really. Bring back the alligator show, I say. Lucy rudely leaves just before Burt's mom shows up at the kitchen door. Why this woman doesn't just ring the doorbell at the front door, like a normal person, is a mystery to me. Especially since it turns out that she and Annie have never met before. Whatever. SuperMom apologizes for her demon spawn's behaviour toward Burt. Burt's mom doesn't seem to care much about that; she's more interested in telling Annie, "If [Burt] really likes a girl, he gives her presents -- little presents that he steals from home." SuperMom gives back the crystal cat she confiscated from Ruthie earlier and advises Burt's mom to give the kids some space to work out their "relationship." I snicker at the irony of a Camden advising someone else to mind her own business.
Mary's on the phone with the amazingly scuzzy Robbie. She asks him about the phone message she received from someone named Cheryl, who wanted to discuss Robbie with her. The lying dirtball tells her he broke up with Cheryl a year ago and that Cheryl is hoping to win him back by making Mary leave him. Oh, okay, cool -- then Mary just won't call her back, tee hee. Mary, Robbie, whatever you do, please don't reproduce. The gene pool would never recover. Robbie encourages her to tell the CamRents the rest of the big secret, but Mary's afraid her father won't take it very well. Finally she defers to Robbie, as she always does. What's the big secret? Hmm, what could it be? Mary hangs up the phone and puts on an engagement ring. "Mrs. Robbie Palmer," she sighs, then smiles dreamily. I nearly miss the entire commercial break because I'm laughing so hard.
When we return, Mary has dropped her little bomb on the CamRents. Predictably, RevCam goes apeshit. SuperMom's still working the reverse psychology angle. She says some very reasonable stuff about this wedding being Mary's decision. Mary's starting to see through Annie's scam, though, and she goes off on a diatribe about it, but SuperMom just asks her what kind of wedding she wants. RevCam picks this moment to interject, "Again, over my dead body!" I'm so sure that can be arranged, Eric. SuperMom does a good job of keeping her cool, and Mary stalks off. RevCam tells Annie he can't take much more, but she claims he won't have to because Mary is ready to crack. She is convinced that Mary doesn't want to marry Robbie and that this whole reverse psychology thing will eventually cause Mary to tell them why she doesn't want to go to college. If this were real life I'd be a tad skeptical, but after all, it's just 7th Heaven.