Back at Dopey's swingin' bachelor pad, the Dopester and John argue about Chickenhead -- again. Dopey says that until he can honestly say whether or not he still has feelings for Heather, he doesn't want to talk to Chickenhead. He tries to weasel out of the whole conversation by saying he has to call Mary and warn her about Robbie. He tries, but the line is busy.

That's because Mary's talking to the amazingly sleazy Robbie. He's wisely decided to head Dopey off at the pass by telling Mary he was out with another woman. Except he's making up some convoluted story about this other woman being his brother's girlfriend, and he met her when she was out shopping for a beeper for her boyfriend, blah blah. It's all very weird, but Mary buys it, even though to me it sounds like this girl would have had to be shopping for a beeper on a Sunday night. It's been about a year since I've shopped in the States on a Sunday night, but I remember the only open stores being grocery stores and those super-big-ass Wal-Marts. Although Mary hasn't asked him, Robbie starts asserting that he is not seeing anyone else. This would be a red flag to most women, but Mary is evidently really stupid. I guess we established that a long time ago, though. Robbie starts telling her about his feelings for her, but she cuts him off to say that they should share their feelings as a gift to each other for Valentine's Day. Blechh! Robbie pretends this is charming, though you can tell he's just congratulating himself for getting away with all these lies.

Mary hangs up the phone and starts bouncing up and down on her bed, saying, "He loves me, he loves me, he loves me!" Lucy asks her about her trust issues, but Mary just scoffingly says, "He loves me; of course I can trust him!" Ouch. That attitude pretty much guarantees that heartbreak is right around the corner.

Meanwhile, Robbie has told his non-Mary girlfriend that he was on the phone with his mother. It must be really hard to keep all those lies straight. He accepts an ice-cream cone from his non-Mary girlfriend, and they walk away with their arms around each other.