7th Heaven
No Sex, Some Drugs, And A Little Rock And Roll

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Sara M: A+ | Grade It Now!
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Here They Come, Walking Down The Street

As Annie tries desperately to get to the third measure of her song, RevCam enters. He tries to speak, but Annie glares at him with her mouth hanging open and her fingers slamming down on the three keys her song requires. RevCam is an impatient Man of God today, though, so he just starts talking. "I don't want to interrupt," he begins, which isn't true, because if he really didn't want to interrupt her, he wouldn't have. Annie stops playing and tells RevCam that he can go ahead and talk, since she's had her four minutes of practice. Four minutes? It seemed more like forty to me. Stupid show feels like it's already been on forever, and there's almost all of it to go. RevCam has some big news: his "old high-school band" is coming to Glenoak and putting on a concert! Annie waits for the other Payless loafer to drop. It does -- RevCam says that the band will be staying with the Camdens. Annie's face is halfway transformed into her outraged clownface when RevCam quickly adds, "Yet -- they're not staying with us." Annie is in no mood for riddles, so RevCam explains that the band lives in an RV. Ridiculously, Annie doesn't know what an "RV" is, so RevCam tells her that it stands for "recreational vehicle." Annie mouths, "Oh." Eric says that he tried to call Annie to ask her if it was okay, but the line was busy, so he just told the band to come on over. Well, at least he attempted to ask Annie this time. Usually, he just brings stray teenage boys home and surprises her. At this, Annie slams her hands down on the piano and storms out of the room as fast as her big ol' pregnant self can move. You'd think a parent in a single-income household with so many kids to support would treat an expensive musical instrument better.

The Opening Credits Timewaster reveals that Peter Tork of The Monkees fame will be appearing in this episode. Well, that's quite the casting coup! First Ed Begley, Jr., then Phyllis Diller in two different roles, and now The Monkee No One Remembers! How does the 7th Heaven casting department do it? Annie could not look more dissatisfied with the horrible hand life has dealt her as she spreads mayonnaise on her children's school lunch sandwiches. There is no indication that these sandwiches have any other ingredients, which shouldn't surprise anyone. Suddenly Annie's face brightens, and she dashes towards the cabinets. Turns out that the CamRents hide cash in a coffee can up there, which would be about number four on the list of most obvious, and therefore stupid, places to hide emergency cash. I wonder why Mary didn't just borrow from the coffee can when she was having her Season Five financial difficulties instead of stealing from her baby brothers, until I remember that 7th Heaven doesn't have a continuity department, so these things can happen. Annie pulls out a couple of bills and drops them into her children's brown paper lunch bags, grinning with unmitigated joy about being off the school lunch-making hook. An alternate solution to her problem would have been telling a few of her five kids to make their lunches their own damn selves.

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7th Heaven

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