RevCam comes home late from work, as if he has a real job. Annie informs him of the bad news about Lucy, Simon, and Robbie. The two of them fret, and RevCam promises to give Robbie a talking-to. "When did Robbie become one of our children?" Annie asks. "I'm not sure, but he is," RevCam answers. No…no, actually, he's not. No wonder these people don't grasp the concept of birth control. They don't even understand basic biology.
At the dangerous, evil party that Lucy foolhardily decided to attend, people are playing darts, drinking bottled drinks, and listening to crappy music. Serena shows her décolletage to Adam while the girls try to avoid being hit on by creepy older guys. I say that until someone's OD'ing on the floor, it's not really a party.
Annie goes up to Simon's room and tells him they need to talk. He doesn't speak to her. She makes him give her the part of his paper that he's done so far. Then she goes into the hall and sees Ruthie looking sad. She has a big smear of orange blush on her face. "I can't take it off! I tried soap and water but I can't take it off!" she cries. What is it -- permanent marker? Annie tells her that she's in more trouble than she's ever been in. Considering how much crap Ruthie gets away with, that's not saying much.
Robbie goes into RevCam's office and happily announces his "good" news. RevCam tries to warn him, but Robbie won't hear of it. He thinks his mom is lying about his dad. We learn that the cops are after Ed for writing hot checks. Robbie yells at RevCam that he's going to move out with his father and be just fine. Then he stomps away as Ed watches from afar and smirks. Obi Wan RevCamobi has his work cut out for him.
In the party bathroom, Ashley apologizes for her mom's immature behavior. Ashley is wearing too much purple eyeshadow, and Lucy's hair is asymmetrically parted just like Serena's was. Lucy realizes that having a "hip and cool mom" isn't all it's cracked up to be. Serena isn't really hip and cool, though. Just because Lucy thought so, that doesn't mean it's true. Serena would be hip and cool if she had a career that allowed her to work from home and make tons of money, and if she listened to Pavement, and if she wore really kick-ass boots. Until Lucy meets such a woman, she should just stay quiet.
Annie tells Matt that Ruthie tricked him. He is upset, and his hair looks silly.
RevCam steps out into the back yard to talk to Ed. Oh, no! Ed is smoking! Now we know he's evil for sure! They haggle back and forth for a while. Then Ed tells RevCam, "You're not his father." "Neither are you," RevCam says. Ooh, burn. RevCam must have new writers backing him up this episode. He looks ready to cry as he tells Ed that Robbie belongs at the CamPound. He ends up threatening to inform the cops of Ed's whereabouts if Ed doesn't leave town. RevCam urges Ed to do the right thing and put Robbie's needs before his own. I like the way RevCam backed up his family values with blackmail. That was nice.