7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Cate: D+ | Grade It Now!

Lucy walks into the CamKitchen to ask Ruthie where Robbie is. Ruthie informs her sister that Robbie is out on a date, which causes Lucy to freak out and demand to know his whereabouts. Ruthie explains that Robbie was planning on taking his date to Flicks and Pete's Pizza. She materialistically adds, "A five-dollar movie and a slice of pizza -- it's amazing he can get a girl to go out with him." What a lovely family-values moment.

Lucy leaves, and RevCam walks in. Ruthie tells some pointless story about her horse biting her equestrian teacher, but RevCam cuts it short to ask if Ruthie knows Christy Parks. Ruthie says that a lot of girls in her school already know about SuperMom's situation with Christy and her parents. She adds, "I think I know why Christy didn't exactly spill her guts to Mom." I can't exactly say I'm waiting breathlessly to find out. RevCam is, though.

Annie is loitering on Christy's parents' property, waiting for them to come home. You have to wonder why none of the neighbours called the cops on her. Maybe all the neighbours hate the Parkses. I sure do. They may be the two most ridiculous characters I've ever seen on this show. Mr. Parks resembles a robot, while Mrs. Parks looks like she's strung out on some pretty major drug. They don't give Annie a chance to explain, and they insist that they will try to make sure she never teaches again. So there is something good about them. Employing some of the worst acting I've ever seen, they try to get Annie to apologize. When she doesn't, they go inside their house, leaving Annie standing speechless on their lawn.

After the parents leave, Christy sneaks out to apologize to Annie and flatter her some more, praising her sincerity and willingness to help the students. How she got that out of Annie's crappy minute-long lecture, I haven't a clue. Christy whines about her parents and their fighting some more, then tells Annie, "You were my last hope, and now I don't think there's anything anyone can do to help me." I'd be a little more sympathetic if that statement weren't so blatantly false. And stupid, to boot.

Simon walks through the CamKitchen on his way out the back door. RevCam asks, "So who's the lucky lady tonight?" I'm convinced he's making fun of Simon. He and SuperMom must derive a lot of secret amusement at the idea of Simon as a lady killer. Who doesn't? When Simon replies, "My friend's girlfriend," the CamRents look at each other but, for once, they don't pry. Annie goes off on a self-righteous diatribe about Christy's parents and their fighting and how it's affecting Christy. RevCam tries to be supportive by stating the obvious: that children learn about relationships from watching their parents. This leads to another stupid fight, which is cut short by wise little Ruthie's observation that the CamRents fight a lot. I know, they do, and it wore thin weeks ago. The next time they get into it, you'll find me in the kitchen, mixing myself a stiff drink. After the long relationship we've shared, you'd think the CamRents would care more about how all their fighting is affecting me and my liver, rather than worrying about that Christy brat.

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7th Heaven




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