7th Heaven
Say A Little Prayer For Me

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Say A Little Prayer For Me

At the Loser Bachelor Pad, Matt and John study. John stops to ask Matt if he believes all that stuff RevCam was saying about prayer at dinner. Matt wants to know why he asks. John asks what difference it makes. Matt says John must be asking for a reason. John's just asking. Matt makes a crack about John praying to pass a test. No, John's studying for the test. Matt asks why he's asking, then. "Forget it. It's not that important," John fumes, rolling his eyes. Yeah, really. Some minister's kid you are, you punk Matt. WARNING: MORE UNREALISTIC SCENAGE AHEAD. John lies back on his bunk and prays, to Matt's amusement. He admits that he was praying to find a nice woman to have dinner with - "a simple request from a simple man." Yeah - simple, all right. They snipe at each other a bit. Then Matt sets down his book and does his own mouth-breathing prayer, presumably for the same thing. John makes a face. I like John and I feel sorry that he has to live with Matt and Matt's hair.

Back at the CamPound, Ruthie's telling her dad that she's getting a pony. RevCam double-takes. Ruthie explains. Simon walks in, overhearing, and tells Ruthie she's not getting a pony. Ruthie says that she prayed for one, so she's going to get one and thereby change her life with the power of prayer like RevCam said. "It doesn't work like that," her dad says. What, he's a minister and he didn't teach his kids the whys and wherefores of prayer a long time ago? Sheesh. Give me a church to run, dang it. Anybody could set a better example than this guy. Ruthie points out that Simon's prayer for a dog was answered with Happy. Annie walks in wearing a huge orange shirt and says that she was the one who got Happy for the family. "God got you to get Happy," Simon corrects. Annie smiles as if that was humorous or cute. "So why can't God get you to get me a pony? What's the difference? You big bunch of non-believers," says Ruthie. Silence that child! Muzzle her! No one says jack. She runs off, declaring loudly that she's getting a pony. Yeah, a pony across the backside, little girl. (Uh... that sounded weirder than I meant it...) Simon asks which CamRent is going to take that on. RevCam says they never know, that she might get a pony. Way to shirk, Eric. Annie leaves to talk to her brattiest daughter.

Ugh. No rest for the wicked... Annie enters Ruthie's room to see her sorting boots and bandanas in preparation for the Coming of the Pony. Ruthie speechifies about her expectations and says that if she doesn't get her wish, it'll be because God didn't hear her. Annie will be right back. Ruthie takes the opportunity to reiterate her prayer in an even ruder, more presumptuous way than before. Then a bunch of locusts fly in and swarm her spoiled ass. Oh, wait. No they don't. Sigh.

We see all the moles on the left side of Mary's face as she soulfully prays, "Please, please, please!" in close-up. Lucy shows up and offers to take Mary out and get her mind off Robbie. "Not what I was praying for," says Mary. Yeah, Mary, we know. You were praying for Robbie to show up with a chaste apology, a diamond, and a release from your contract. Lucy opines that the CamRents are probably praying that Robbie will never call again. Mary freaks and runs out of the room.

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7th Heaven

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