7th Heaven
Seven Is Enough

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Seven Is Enough

Speaking of annoying scenes, here's a textbook example, as Dopey confronts the cashier from the hardware store. He explains to her about being mugged with his mother a few months back, in an episode which I never saw but which most assuredly sucked all the same. He tells Emma how frightening the experience was, and how it changed him. He says he "would like to have the old [Dopey] back." Somehow he relates this to giving his mother her wedding rings back, though I really don't see the connection. A commercial break leaves us all on the edge of our seats regarding the outcome of this scene.

Grandma Ruth knocks on the door of Lucy and Mary's room and then walks right in without even waiting for an answer. Lucy gets up to leave, but Ruth tells her she has something for her. It's the first love letter the Colonel ever sent her. She says, "After spending time together, I can tell you are a person who appreciates great passion." Hee! Yeah, right, and that's why she's dating Jimmy Plywood, who's just a fountain of unbridled passion. Ruth leaves the letter behind with a couple of admonitions: "See that it gets back to me in the morning, and don't you tell the Colonel I showed you that." She leaves, and the girls start reading avidly. I kind of wish they'd read aloud, because I'm very curious as to what exactly constitutes a "love letter" from such a cold fish as the Colonel. In any case, Lucy is won over. And that's all it took? Hmm, maybe I should doctor up some kind of a fake love letter that I can let people read when they're pissed at me.

SuperMom gets her wedding rings back. She cries.

Finally, it's time for the Colonels to hit the road. Much sap is exchanged, but only with the grandkids, since the CamRents are nowhere to be seen. Lucy returns her grandmother's love letter, while the Colonel is standing two feet away. What a dumb-ass! Grandma Ruth asked Lucy to do two things -- and very simple things at that. She can't even get that right? No wonder nobody likes her. George is devastated that the Colonels are leaving, and he clings to Grandma Ruth, sobbing. This is RevCam's cue to come out into the hallway and hand over George's adoption papers to Ma and Pa Colonel. He tells them that he thinks they will make good parents for George, and that the boy should be with the parents he wants. I think that makes everyone pretty happy, including me, since I certainly have no intention of looking at George week after week. RevCam makes a sappy speech and gets all weepy as he compliments his father. With a very actorly twinkle in his eye, the Colonel says, in his big, booming, actorly voice, "We haven't done so well with the father-son deal. Shall we just try friends?" RevCam holds out his hand for a handshake, but the Colonel hugs him instead. Aw! This might have been a trifle more sentimental for me if I didn't already know that RevCam and his father will be at each other's throats pretty much every time they meet from now on.

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7th Heaven




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