Admissions Guy 1: What top-notch school is he talking about?
Admissions Guy 2: I don't know the only college in his area is Crawford, and that's a school for how can I put this? "Angels."
Simon says that he can't wait until next semester or next fall to go to CSA; he needs "immediate admittance." He's got good grades, and his SAT scores are in the top tenth percentile. They will have his CHSPE scores in a couple of weeks. "My future is in your hands," Simon says. "The End" flashes on the screen.
Admissions Guy 1: Okay well I'm really glad that's over. I hated that goddamn video.
Admissions Guy 2: Me too. Why did that kid spend the last forty minutes talking about his family members who we don't know and who are totally irrelevant to his qualifications for college?
Admissions Guy 1: I don't even want to think about it anymore. Let's get out of --
Suddenly, there's a record scratch sound effect and Robert Evans's voice comes in, with what looks like a paparazzi picture of him and the Photoshopped words "Hey kid, dig deeper, Robert Evans" and "Hollywood producer." Unlike Spelling, Evans is not a "legend."
Admissions Guy 1: What the ?
Admissions Guy 2: Why is this still going? And how did he get a voice-over from Robert Evans?
Admissions Guy 1: Not voluntarily, I'm sure.
I can totally understand why Brenda Hampton would want to have Robert Evans -- known best for being the paragon of virtue this show prides itself on teaching its audience -- do a voice-over. Similarly, I can totally understand why Evans -- who has a new television show coming out -- would want to appear on a television show that is so in line with his lifestyle. Another picture of Robert Evans sitting in his car talking on his cell phone flies up with "Hey Simon -- go get 'em! Robert Evans" Photoshopped on it as Evans tells Simon to tell CSA the real reason why he wants to go to college early. Evans says that Simon needs to put his heart and soul into the video, and it's not done yet.