Warning: what's coming up is awfully cutesy, even for 7th Heaven. Simon is grousing about not being able to hang with the guys. Ruthie says he could hang out with her instead. Well, Ruthie, there are lots of things Simon could do. I mean, he could poke his eyes out with red-hot knitting needles, but I can't imagine he'd want to do that any more than he'd want to hang with you. ["I can. Pass the Bunsen burner." -- Sars] Simon goes on to talk about his chest hair, and I do mean "chest hair," singular. Fortunately, he shows it only to Ruthie, not to the viewership at large. He tries to tell Ruthie that some of the stuff he does with the guys "would probably make [her] throw up." He demonstrates with a little armpit-farting. She tells him -- sorry, I just have to compose myself here before I can carry on. Okay, she tells him she "doesn't have to do the fake kind." Happy yelps in protest and runs off, presumably to tell her agent she's decided to take the cheap dog-food commercial after all if it will just get her off this show.
Good heavens, Dopey is lecturing Mary about responsibility! He says, "What kind of disciplined, mature person decides to coast through their senior year?" Um, wouldn't that be most people? Mary mocks his inability to obtain a scholarship and asks, "How many times do I have to hear this stuff from you?" He replies, "Until you get it right." I'm expecting that now Mary will finally do that "unthinkable" thing from the teaser by killing Matt slowly and painfully, but she just settles for pushing him out of her room.
The next scene, between RevCam and Lucy, would be quite sweet if it weren't for the fact that they're discussing her dumb-ass "student court." He makes the supreme sacrifice by asking her about it, thereby opening the floodgates to her stupid babbling. She claims that being a part of student court feels important. She doesn't mention anything about being a total loser. RevCam tries to compare Lucy's student-court experience to his own job, saying that he helps people gain new perspectives. He manages, without sniggering, to ask Lucy if she's helped anyone gain some perspective. I translate this to mean that since the essence of a Camden's existence is to meddle in other people's business all the livelong day, you'd think occasionally they'd score a hit. Lucy isn't sure if her incredibly meaningful work on the student court has helped anyone. RevCam finishes the pep talk. The director must've nodded off again, because the camera catches the actress who plays Lucy rolling her eyes, presumably in disgust over having to pretend to take this whole student court thing seriously.