7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Cate: A+ | Grade It Now!

She's also waiting for him in the front hallway, where she wants to know about his smoking. She wails, "I make you so crazy, you started smoking? What's next, alcohol? Drugs?" Oh, shut the fuck up, Lucy. It's not like Kevin's a twelve-year-old threatened by gateway drugs. He's not even human, for that matter. Kevin reassures her that it's not "all" her fault. How kind! Instead of smacking him, Lucy kisses him instead. Because she really is that dumb. Need further evidence? She makes a "deal" with him. She will stop bugging him about proposing, and in return, he can take his time to do it. I'm not sure she quite understands the meaning of the word "deal." Just what does she get out of the "deal"? You know, if she's this stupid in all her transactions, I wouldn't mind playing poker with her. As long as she wears a muzzle, of course. She does have one request, though: that Kevin not to propose to her on Valentine's Day. I really hope I'm not spoiling anything when I tell you that he will totally ignore the one thing she has asked for. Because he really is that much of a prick.

Roxanne and Chandler are still sitting on some steps in front of a house. I thought this was Chandler's place, but now Roxanne is making me think it's her house. Oh, who cares? It's the last scene of the show, and that's what we need to focus on. There's some boring lovey-dovey stuff which RevCam interrupts. Roxanne goes inside so that he and RevBong can talk.

Eric tries to give Chandler something that looks like a brochure. Chandler looks like he's just been offered a pamphlet on toe fungus until Eric tells him that it's a plane ticket to go "home." I'm not sure where "home" is exactly, but since there are only four states in the CamVerse, it shouldn't be too hard to work it out. That's a pretty nice gesture -- unless it's a one-way ticket, of course. Chanandler asks, rather pointlessly, "Didn't Thomas Wolfe say you can never go home again?" RevCam replies, "Well, Eric Camden says you can go home again, and you should." Wow, that wasn't at all stilted or awkward. When Chandler says he's not ready to see his father yet, RevCam explains that the ticket is "open-ended," so RevBong can go whenever he wants. He explains that he wants to "do right" by Chandler, and that he cares about him. It's not a bad scene, and I'd probably be able to take it seriously if it weren't for the fact that practically everything that's occurred in the hour before this was so damned offensive and stupid.

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7th Heaven




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