7th Heaven
Sorority Boys

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Freaks And Greeks

Matt is painting Leah's toenails in her bedroom. Leah asks Matt if he's ever had a boyfriend while we see that Matt has actually managed to paint part of her foot. Even that quadriplegic artist guy can do a better job than Matt at painting toenails. Leah holds Matt's hands and then…loud music starts up and Leah closes her window and yells about how the KOK house is so loud. But it's not the KOK house, it's the stoned DOGs! They're dancing around and kind of having an orgy. Weird…I thought Ecstasy made you do that, not pot. Matt massages Leah's shoulders, and she asks if he wants to "sleep over." Doesn't he live two doors down from her as it is?

Oily Guy finally passes out. Lex grabs the tape, but then he passes out and drops it in the pile of porno tapes that are going on the KOKtail Kruise.

In Leah's bed, Leah kisses Matt goodnight. She says she had a really good time. Leah is kind of lame, y'all. All she did was get her hair washed and her toenails painted badly. Then they kiss. This movie gets weirder and weirder. Matt jumps out of bed, holding a balloon in front of his crotch area, and says he's confused. Leah is too, and says she's sorry. Matt runs away, and Leah feels like an idiot.

In the living room, Harland falls through the table. The girls search him and find more pot. Haven't they had enough? They must be melting into the floor by now. Giantess breaks the bong with her brute strength. That means that the prop people for this film actually had to have constructed a break-away bong.

Morning at the KOK house. Lex wakes up hugging Oily Guy, then realizes what he's doing and is disgusted. He also realizes that he's lost the tape in the box of porn. He runs out of the bedroom -- and into the Walk of Shame! They do the chant, but Lex punches some guy in the face, then trips over his heels. He gets up, and some guy takes his picture. I wonder if Lex just learned his lesson.

Lex walks into the Powerpuff bedroom, and Harland asks him if he got the tape. Then they notice something on Lex's skirt. It's dried…uh, "Monica Lewinsky" stains. That's just great. I am now going to keep in the spirit of this film and order a keg. All for myself, so I can get through the rest of this. And I am not going to go cheap for this, either -- Sam Adams all the way! Matt runs in and asks about the tape. Lex asks him where the hell he was last night, then asks if it was with Leah. He can't believe that Matt would betray him for a DOG. Matt takes offense, and then tells Lex that he's an ugly woman. Lex says that Matt should have had his back last night, and Matt says that Oily Guy got there first. Then they have a fight, and Lex knocks Matt off the second floor balcony, which is kind of homicidal. Lex runs down the stairs, and Matt grabs two dildos, and they have a sword fight. It is stupid. I am a quarter of the way through my keg, and this movie is still pissing me off. Lex starts crying because he used to be cool and now he's an ugly girl. Matt consoles him, and then notices an ad for a powderpuff football game that apparently determines who gets to go on the KOKtail Kruise. Oh, good thing this plot development was mentioned earlier so as not to come completely out of nowhere. Matt and Lex decide to win the football game so they can get on the KOKtail Kruise.

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7th Heaven




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