7th Heaven
Stuck In The Middle With You

Episode Report Card
Sara M: D | Grade It Now!
Cutting a rug

In the counseling session, RevCam and Annie are having it out about the burial plots. Annie yells that Eric is insulting her family, which I'll bet he was, and runs out of the room. I notice that she is wearing black pantyhose under a grey skirt with a blue sweater. Annie has no fashion sense, ever. Then a member from each of the couples follows her. Those who remain look annoyed at RevCam and his piss-poor counseling abilities.

Lucy has lined Jimmy and Rod up in front of the door. She tells them she'll make her decision soon. We see that all the Camden kids and Anniedad are all listening at the top of the stairs like a bunch of nosy, immature, busybodying, and generally shitty family members. Lucy kicks the two out. The rest of the fam make their decisions. Anniedad, Matt, and Ruthie are for Jimmy, while Mary, Simon, and Ruthie are for Rod. Everyone looks at Ruthie, all confused because she voted twice. She says something "cute," and there's a commercial. As the scene fades out, I notice that everyone looks depressed. And rightfully so.

Night at the Camden house. RevCam is typing on his laptop. There is a knock at his door, and Annie says there is someone here to see him. She sounds pissed. Michael comes in and looks scared. He apologizes for walking out of the session. He wants to move out, but he doesn't know how to tell his mom. RevCam suggests talking to her with his wife. Michael says that he doesn't even want to bring it up because of how his dad left her. They talk about how deadbeats cause problems for everyone. RevCam gives Michael some psychobabble about fighting and bigger issues and then tells Michael to talk to Katie.

In the kitchen, Annie is making a face in an extreme close-up. Scary! A knock at the door. It's Bonnie. She wants to talk to Annie. Why, Bonnie, why?! Annie offers her some tea, and they chat about medical school. Bonnie says that it's not the money that she cares about -- she thinks that once Ugly becomes a doctor he'll dump her for a patient. She thinks that if Ugly doesn't need her financial support, he won't need her. Bonnie, you have some insecurity issues you really need to deal with. Away from my television screen, please. With one sentence, Annie gets Bonnie to admit to herself that her fear is irrational. Then Annie turns to one of Lucy's anorexic friends and tells her that she's not fat and the girl is magically cured! There is a knock on the front door. Anniedad answers the door like this: "HI, I'mAnnie'sfathercomein!" Then Robert enters and waits for the Rev in the living room. Anniedad asks him what his problem is, because he is rude like the rest of his family. Robert says it's not really a problem. Anniedad guesses that he's the one with the pregnant wife. I think it's highly inappropriate that RevCam discusses his counselees with anyone. But then Anniedad says that he wasn't told "everything," whatever that means, so I guess it's only slightly inappropriate. Anniedad tells Robert about his dead wife, and how he's glad that he has Annie or else he'd be all alone. That's a pretty selfish reason to have children, but whatever. Robert decides to go home. He is intercepted by the Rev, who asks if Robert wanted help. Robert says that Anniedad has solved all his problems and leaves. Have you ever tried the Rodeo Burger from Burger King? It is delicious. I'm eating one right now. Oh, yeah, the show. Anniedad, dispenser of all wisdom, tells RevCam that it's better to be married than right. Annie walks over and says she's going to bed and asks if RevCam is coming up soon. RevCam doesn't get the hint, unlike me. I throw up my Rodeo Burger, because the thought of those two having make-up sex is gross.

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7th Heaven




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