In the CamKitchen, Lucy is telling SuperMom how bad she feels about not trusting Robbie. Mary walks in and passive-aggressifies (tm gwen) that she will be out of their way in a moment. She also explains how Simon actually did get the condom from Robbie. Annie says that she will be having a long talk with Simon when he gets home. Good -- maybe Simon can explain birth control to her. Mary starts to leave, but SuperMom and Lucy ask her to stay and tell them what happened with her and Robbie. Mary confesses that she feels left out of the family, and StuporMom tries to reassure her, even though she admits that she still doesn't trust Mary. Instead of rolling her eyes and leaving, Mary actually validates their stupid prying by asking them what they want to know. Lucy is curious as to why Mary came home so suddenly to talk to Robbie. Mary reveals her "plan," and said she would have just phoned Robbie but she was hoping that in person he would be more easily swayed, especially if she kissed him. This gives SuperMom the opportunity to relay this week's lecture on how women should not use any form of sex to sway men into doing something, since that implies women can't be honest or smart enough to get what they want on their own. Okay, I actually agree with her, though I'm not crazy about some of the things she says to make her point. And I also want to know: What about women using sex to get something from other women? I guess that concept doesn't exist in the Camden universe. Anyway, Annie has to repeat her point a few times before Mary gets it. She concludes with, "We all know when it's right and when it's not right to have sex." Damn straight! So all you people in monogamous, heterosexual relationships should feel free to have sex, as long as you're only doing it to procreate.
Ah, they've been saving the stupidest for last. Since Ruthie's hair had a bigger part in this episode than she did, the little demon urchin gets the not-at-all-contrived honour of calling a radio talk show to deliver this week's PSA: "You can remind everyone that it's never too early to talk to your children about sex. After all, you don't want them picking up information on the streets or from a houseguest or on TV. You want the information to come straight from you, the parents, right?" I think it would have been much funnier if they had put forth this info at the beginning of the show so that people could have just turned off their televisions and had frank discussions of sex with their children. But I guess it's safe to say that the producers won't be asking MBTV for advice anytime soon.