7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Cate: B+ | 373 USERS: C
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Teased

As RevCam is trying to catch up with Simon, the phone rings. Torn between wanting to talk to his son and hoping that this is the call he's been expecting from The Shopping Network about all the special night-stalking gear he ordered, RevCam elects to answer the phone. Unfortunately, the caller is just looking for Simon. RevCam walks into Simon's room with the cordless phone. Simon rudely grunts, "What?" Maybe he's morose because nobody gave him a nickname. Come on, Simon, cheer up! We can fix that. What would you prefer? "Simple Simon"? "Slime-on"? How about "Semen"? RevCam hands over the phone and stays to eavesdrop. I'll bet you're as surprised as I am to find out that the caller is Mick, Tormented Boy, whom Simon defended earlier. Mick is calling to thank Simon for his help, which Simon graciously acknowledges before taking a moment from the call to tell RevCam to scram. When Simon says that the tormentors were "losers," Mick agrees, adding, "That's why I'm going to blow them away." He says this in a conversational tone, as though he were mentioning a trip to the mall. I know that people who kill people don't necessarily sound crazy all the time, but I'm having a hard time accepting Mick as a potential killer, and I guess I'll just have to blame the acting for that. Simon has to take this revelation seriously, though, so he tries to talk Mick out of this plan -- even though, as you may recall, the whole shooting-people thing was originally Simon's idea anyway. When Simon very reasonably explains, "Shooting people won't solve your problems," Mick sarcastically replies, "Yeah, I should just let all their teasing roll off my back. That'll work." Well, Mick, actually, it will, though I know you're still a little young to see that. After promising that Simon won't get hurt, Mick hangs up. Of course, he doesn't say goodbye, though I'm a little less inclined to berate him for that when he's, you know, planning on killing a bunch of people.

No wonder Simon's looking morose and picking at his dinner while RevCam grills him about his bad mood. Evidently, Simon is not ready to share what he found out with Eric, and who can blame him? RevCam's not the easiest, least-judgmental guy to talk to. Simon's trying to play it off like he's just upset about having got on the wrong bus before, but RevCam -- employing his amazing psychic stalking powers -- comes up with this fabulous run-on sentence: "Simon, my gut tells me that you got on the wrong bus because you weren't paying attention, because you were already upset about something, and that something had to do with someone teasing someone, since that was the subject of your speech at dinner." Simon understands enough of that to be able to refute it. He asks RevCam to leave. That he asks this in a rude manner is about all I would expect of him.

7th Heaven

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