7th Heaven
That Touch Of Bink (1)

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Take Back Your Bink

After a weird exterior shot of a house that looks nothing like the house Mrs. Bink lives in, we wind up in Mrs. Bink's living room. Chandler...Hampton says he feels that he's imposed on the Camdens long enough, and that he should move out. And into Mrs. Bink's guest house. Fuck, does everyone have a guest house in Glenoak? Lucky bastards. Mrs. Bink asks if he's not concerned with what people in church will say about it, and "when the worm turns it can get pretty ugly." And what about rent? Chandler says he could run errands and drive her places. A goer? Step-in Fetchit? Yup. She grabs his arm, looks skyward and intones, "Someone opened up the Pearly GATES. And fetched me an ANGEL!" She says she will only go to church on the holidays, and they have a deal.

Peter knocks on the CamPound door with a check from his mom and a personal donation. And something from Dick. Eric looks at Dick's check and is flummoxed. Peter asks, "What do you make of a guy that'll give up that kind of dough just to impress people?" Somewhere, a dog barks warningly.

Church. Eric takes his easy chair next to Chandler. He asks how it's going over at Mrs. Bink's house. Chandler says that "it finally feels like [he] has some purpose other than just filling in." Wow, who knew men of the cloth had such metaphysical leanings. Should a pastor feel that empty most of the time? Couldn't, say, his love of God fill him with meaning? Oh well! SamVid file in and apologize to everyone for stealing their money. Everyone says, "That's okay!" No one says it's wrong. No punishment is doled out. Peter, Dick, and Paris slide in. Just as Paris is saying hi to Annie and ruffling the hair of the creepy, creepy twins, Dick leans in and whispers to Peter that he "isn't going to mess this up. Try again and [he'll] get [Peter's] dog out of the house. After that, [he'll] get [Peter] out of the house. Understand?" Ooh! The dog was right! The dog was riiiight! You know, I think the Brenda is trying to send a message via the themes of this week's episode: She's being blackmailed, and she can't report it or something bad will happen. Aaron Spelling is sending her bits of someone's fingers, and she has to keep churning out episodes or else. Brenda? GIVE UP NOW. It'll be okay. Blink rapidly if you agree. Eric takes the pulpit and says it's "been an interesting first week back. We all have a lot of work to do, and maybe the work is to love each other." Peter looks worried, then shifts his eyes to Dick, and the screen fades to black. TO BE CONTINUED!

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7th Heaven




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