7th Heaven
The Anniversary

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Incestual Healing

Peter enters the CamPound backyard, where Ruthie is attempting to kill her brothers by throwing a large ball at their heads. Thus far, it seems that she has had little success, although she might have given them brain damage -- it's impossible to tell. Peter asks Ruthie if she wants to go to a movie with him tonight. Ruthie says she would, but she has other plans. Peter's like, "oh, whatever then," obviously not caring to hear any more about her stupid plans. Ruthie asks him if he wants to know what her plans are anyway; he says he doesn't. She says that's good, because she can't tell him. Then why even bring it up at all, Ruthie? Also, shut up. Peter starts talking about his dad and says that he loves having him around again, and would really like it if he was around "on a more permanent basis." SamVid show that they possess the motor and coordination skills required to play catch. Next thing you know, they'll be figuring out how to use underwear, and only four years after their peers!

Lucy's face is all scrunched up and silly-looking, but this time it's for a reason: her husband has pulled her over for going twice the speed limit. Roxanne tells Kevin to give his wife a break; he says that he is by only giving her a warning, and he took an oath, blah blah blah. Whatever, Kevbot -- my best friend's father was a cop, and this meant that my friend got to put a special sticker on his windshield that told any officer who pulled him over who his father was, and thus that he shouldn't get a ticket. When my best friend and I were suspended from school, his father took to following the superintendent of schools who personally suspended us around town and pulling him over for any and all traffic violations. The best was when the guy got a hundred-dollar ticket for riding his bike on the wrong side of the road. What I'm trying to say is, when you live in a small town and you are somehow related to one its police officers, you do get a couple benefits. All the same, you shouldn't drive like a crazy person, Lucy, especially after your own brother ran some kid over in his car.

Kevin asks Lucy why she was going so fast; Lucy says she saw Matt, so she needs to rush home to tell Mommy and Daddy. Kevin says that this does not qualify as an emergency, adding that she should mind her own business. True, but shut up, Kevin. Roxanne has had enough of this, so she jumps in the police car, turns on the sirens, and has Lucy follow her home, now able to speed legally. Kevin doesn't seem to mind, so either his precious oath does not extend to using the sirens for non-emergencies, or the car is outfitted with a special "Matt Alert 3000" siren that is to be used for just such an occasion as this.

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7th Heaven

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