Simon and Asslee walk along the beach. Asslee whines about how Simon won't let her help him. "It's been three months," she says, as if that means that enough time has passed and Simon should just get over it already. Simon tells Asslee he doesn't want to talk to her. Asslee squeaks that that's okay, as long as she can be with him. Simon says no to that too. I guess the accident made him realize that life is too short to date girls with no acting talent whose famous-ish sisters got them parts on terrible television shows. Good for him; growing up is all about learning lessons like these. Simon says that school is starting next week and it's going to be a "living hell" for him, and there's no reason for it to be one for her too. Asslee has no apparent reaction to this, but I guess Simon read something in her blank facial expression, because he says, "What? You think I'm feeling sorry for myself? 'Cause I'm not. I'm feeling sorry for the kid I ran over, and his brother and his parents." No, you're not, Simon. If you were, you wouldn't begin every sentence you've uttered about the accident with "I." Asslee says that the dead kid's brother has been Simon's classmate for four years, so he must know by now that Simon isn't a bad guy and didn't mean to kill his brother. Thanks to Annie, he probably also knows that Simon is a virgin. Simon very astutely points out that no one could be that understanding, adding that "if it had been [him], and some guy in his car had come along and hit Ruthie, [does Asslee] think [Simon] would have just went up [sic] to him in school and said, 'It's okay, I know you didn't mean to do it'?" No, I would also expect you to give him a high-five and a thank-you card.
Kevin comes downstairs to answer the phone. What rude bastard calls a house with young children this late? "Is that you, Detective Michaels?" Kevin asks. Oh, that kind of rude bastard. The only explanation I can think of for why Det. Michaels is calling the Camden beach house this late and not giving his name until directly confronted is that he was making a crank call. You think he would at least have used one of those voice distortion things, though. I wonder if he was going to ask if the Camdens' refrigerator is running, or just breathe heavily for a minute and then hangs up? Kevin listens for about three more seconds, then tells Det. Michaels that he will give RevCam the message, and Eric will decide how to "handle it." We then see a shot of the Glenoak Community Church. I never realized how damn big that place was. Also, someone has written "Thou Shalt Not Kill" on the church sign in dramatic red spray paint. The flute tweetles sadly. I didn't even know flutes could do that, but there you go. I must say, I admire the choice of fonts used on the church sign. I'm not usually a big fan of serifs, but they seem right here. ["Desperate to find something positive to say, are we?" -- Sars]