Upstairs, Lucy and Ruthie are talking about Carlos. Lucy thinks that Ruthie knows something about Carlos and Mary that she doesn't, and she wants to know what it is, because her own life is so unfulfilling that she must concern herself with other people's business. Ruthie says that Carlos is ready to tell everyone about the marriage. Lucy says that Mary doesn't want people to know she's married, and she wants an annulment. At this point, Peter walks in, shakes his head, then walks right back out again. Okay. Ruthie thinks that Mary might have changed her mind. Why would she do that? Lucy asks. "Isn't it obvious?" Ruthie says. Actually, it's not. Please tell me -- oh. The scene ended.
RevCam throws some pills into his mouth. Before he can finish his attempt to OD on aspirin, Asslee rudely lets herself into the house. RevCam snots that he missed her in church today. Jeez, does anyone go to church anymore? This town is going to hell in a handbasket! Asslee says that she might have done something "really really bad." How bad on the scale of badness? As bad as this show? As bad as Asslee's "acting"? Is such a level of badness even possible? RevCam asks what happened, then figures out that it has something to do with Simon. Asslee isn't talking, so RevCam pulls out the "Annie's craaaazy!" card and says Asslee better hurry up and tell him before Annie comes downstairs. Understandably frightened, Asslee quickly reveals that she took Simon to the airport. I'm surprised Simon didn't just walk to the place, as I'm assuming that the airport in question is the nearby Glenoak International Airport. Book your JetBlue flight to any one of the four acknowledged states today! RevCam asks if Simon will be home in time for school tomorrow, because that's really the most important thing right now. Asslee says that's doubtful, since he's going to New York to see Matt. Annie comes downstairs and hears the last part of this. Upon seeing Annie, Asslee immediately turns around and runs out of the house. That was awesome, but Asslee still sucks. Annie asks who is going to New York to see Matt. Who do you think, stupid? And now Peter's entered the scene on his way out of the house. He adds that his uncanny ability to overhear private information is a curse. In normal circumstances, I would find this little subplot annoying and useless. But when it's taking time away from Simon and his deal with the car accident, something that could be actually interesting to watch, I am infuriated.