7th Heaven
The Ring

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The Ring

Back east, at the airport security office, Mary is bitching at Lucy for antagonizing the guards and saying that she was a terrorist. Lucy asks when her sister became so knowledgeable about airport security procedures. Golly, I'd have thought that even the average preteen would know you don't mouth off to airport security people, but apparently it's news to Lucy, who goes on to diss the police officer who confiscated her bag, saying, "I'd like to meet the pea-brained moron with a badge who decided my hairdryer and makeup were a threat to anyone." Right on cue, the officer walks up. He's very pretty -- and obviously easygoing, since instead of displaying any disgust or annoyance at Lucy's rudeness, he just smiles winsomely at her and invites her to call him Kevin. Of course, it's possible that he wasn't offended at Lucy's words since he really is a "pea-brained moron." His next words help to further that impression: "Sorry for the inconvenience, but these days we have to take every threat seriously -- even threats from beautiful girls." Lucy doesn't find that at all creepy, as she continues to leer at him. My suspicions about Officer Kevin's stupidity are confirmed when he asks the girls out to dinner as a way to apologize. Apologize for what? Doing his job? What a tool. Mary declines for both of them, since she is obviously eager to get started stalking hunky firefighter Ben. Lucy pulls her aside and, in a voice loud enough to be easily overheard by Kevin, starts talking about how "gorgeous" he is. Mary still refuses to accompany her, even though everyone knows that if someone is "gorgeous," it's stupid not to accept a date with him. Lucy threatens to call the CamRents and reveal that Mary has a "plan" that involves Ben. The fact that this finally wins Mary's cooperation is utterly pathetic, but pretty much what I'd expect from this show.

Dopey is having lunch with his father on the Pete's Pizza restaurant set, where he is accusing RevCam of not being supportive enough about the impending nuptials. RevCam says he is being supportive; Dopey disagrees. After a few more rounds of that, Dopey finally says, "Okay, then lend me four-thousand dollars." He wants the money so he can buy Plot Contrivance "the kind of ring she deserves." Well, considering she just finished berating him for not getting her a ring -- even though she knows he has no money -- I'm not sure she deserves much of anything. When RevCam says, "So you want her to have a ring, she wants to have a ring, but you can't afford a ring." Dopey snidely says, "Thanks for the recap." Aw, you're welcome, Matt. And thank you for the shout-out. Despite the fact that Dopey is so rude, RevCam is really excited because he's thought of a way to help out his son.

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7th Heaven




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