7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Sara M: B+ | 385 USERS: C+
YOU GRADE IT
Racism With a Side of Spying

Annie's on the phone with Patricia, also known as Reverend Hamilton's wife, also known as Trudy from Miami Vice. All I remember about Trudy was that the nameplate on her desk read "Big Booty Trudy." Which is kind of mean, and I'm surprised Edward James Olmos let that kind of thing fly. Anyway, Patricia agrees to come to the shower. Annie doesn't know how to quit when she's ahead, so she asks if she can borrow Patricia's "big coffee pot." Patricia says she'll "messenger" it over to the CamPound, like, what? Either that's one hell of a big coffee pot, or Patricia is almost as lazy as RevCam.

The kids unpack the groceries. RevCam comes in, holding a grocery bag, and scolds Matt for leaving a bag with mayonnaise, hamburger, and eggs in the car, like, maybe if you pitched in, RevCam, that wouldn't have happened. RevCam asks if anyone wants to talk about the new babies, and how different things will be once they arrive. No one does. So RevCam grabs a laundry basket and leaves. Matt says that RevCam's right; the new babies will be a big change for them, and "once they're here, they're here forever," except when they're behind the couch. Ruthie and Simon start to wonder if they won't like the twins.

Annie naps. Ruthie enters the room, ostensibly to water the plants, but really to get attention from her mother. She tells Annie the sad story of how Bobby saw her underwear and won't leave her alone, like, this subplot could not die fast enough. Annie's first concern about the matter is why wasn't Ruthie wearing the shorts her control freak mother picked out for her. Ruthie tries to make some quasi-feminist statement on how unfair it is that women can't wear skirts without guys looking up them, and what is wrong with the world? Annie says she'll have to get back to Ruthie on that one. Not getting the hint, Ruthie tells Annie to take her time because she isn't going anywhere.

RevCam's in the bathroom, although he isn't using it, thank god. Ruthie walks in on him, only to get interrogated on whether or not the CamKids have all been using the same ratty towel. Ew. Ruthie says she hasn't; she's been using the hair-dryer to dry off. It makes her feel "free." Oh. I...have no response to that. Let's just pretend it never happened, shall we? I think that's best. Ruthie asks RevCam what will happen if no one likes the new babies. RevCam says they'll be babies "for a while." Yeah, like, ten years at the rate they're going now. So, continues RevCam, everyone will have time to get used to each other. Ruthie thinks that RevCam is hiding something from her because he's using his "minister voice," and did RevCam say this stuff to Lucy when Simon was about to be born? "Sort of," RevCam says. Notice how Ruthie doesn't ask if RevCam said that to Simon when Annie was pregnant with her, most likely because she rightfully suspects that Annie never actually was pregnant with her.

7th Heaven

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