7th Heaven

Episode Report Card
Cate: C+ | 525 USERS: C+
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Bitch, bitch, bitch

Upstairs at Dopey's, Heather and Matt are discussing how cool it was that she vanquished Tha N-Dog and company. Dopey says he never knew about her self-defense skills, and she points out that there's a lot he doesn't know about her. I guess it's a good thing they never got married, although I'd rather see her as a member of the CamFam than (shudder!) Robbie. She compliments Dopey's incredible pants; he tries to be modest. Then Heather drops the bombshell that she's dating a professor at Crawford. Dopey evidently does not care much. Heather says she hopes he's not wearing new pants just for her. What an odd thing to say -- but since everyone else seems so obsessed with Dopey's pants this week, I guess she's just following the crowd. Dopey injects a note of reason when he says, "They're just new pants." Amen! Can we all please stop talking about them now?

Okay, kids, just a few more educational lectures to get through and then we're home free. And just in the nick of time, too, because really, they've pretty much run out of ways to illustrate this week's point. John has a talk with Simon about how things are worse for women now, in terms of the hatred they receive from men. Personally, I don't think that's true, but maybe some women disagree. I'll bet that it's always been fashionable to be alarmist about the current moral state of the world when compared to past times. Oh, and then there's the fact that I don't put much stock in what the writers of 7th Heaven say, because they're so often wrong and misguided. John's speech is good, it just covers territory that's already been covered in this episode.

SuperMom drives up and Simon gets into the car. Annie asks him what he's going to do now about the Norton situation, and Simon replies that he's more worried about what Annie must think of him than he is of what Norton thinks. Or, to put it the way Simon does to Annie, "My biggest worry is that you may never respect me as a man." I would like to nominate this line as the single funniest one I have ever heard on this show. Simon continues to apologize. He adds, "I never want to be a part of anything that humiliates you or Lucy or Ruthie." I snicker because Mary is conspicuously absent from the list. Mother/son hug, treacly background music, end of scene.

7th Heaven

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