And now we side-wipe (the hell? A fucking side-wipe? I…don't even want to know how or why the decision was made to employ this for most of the episode's scene transitions) to Chandler and Roxanne leaving the house, Chandler in all sorts of disarray, his tie gone, and his top two buttons undone. I guess Ernie and Sally fed him up real good. Roxanne tells Chandler to get help from RevCam. Chandler says he doesn't need it. Roxanne says that even Dr. Phil wouldn't be able to handle Ernie and Sally. "They're crazy. And not fun-crazy. Crazy-crazy." Um, what exactly is "fun-crazy"? When the voices in their heads tell them to make balloon animals for the neighborhood children? Goddamn this show. Also, how are Ernie and Sally any different than Annie when her dad married Ginger? She was just as ridiculously overprotective and bitchy, and no one called her crazy then. Even if they all may have thought it.
Side-wipe to Chandler explaining the situation to Mrs. Bink and Fred Fleming. Fred's kids will be okay with the wedding as long as Mrs. Bink signs a pre-nuptial agreement. Mrs. Bink says no one can stop them. Double F says that he wishes his mother had never found out about this, and that he can't choose between Mrs. Bink and his mother. And he's pleasantly surprised that his kids cared enough to ask for a pre-nup. Mrs. Bink says that she has more money than Fred, and his kids only care about themselves and their inheritance. Way to make Fred feel better, Mrs. Bink. Fred whines that he doesn't know what to do anymore. Mrs. Bink asks him if it's difficult going through life without a ballsack. I mean, "spine." Fred says he does have a spine. Mrs. Bink asks him to use it. Fred starts to cry, and it appears that the apple doesn't fall far from the terrible-cry-acting tree. Eileen Brennan decides that she's had quite enough of this shit, and leaves the show.
Side-wipe to RevCam opening the door to Chandler asking for help. RevCam smiles smugly.
Ass-wipe -- oh, sorry, I meant "side-wipe" -- to Mrs. Bink sleeping, only to have her slumber disturbed by a flashlight in her face. It's a home invasion -- of CAMDENS (and their friends)!!! Annie smiles demonically. "Am I dead?" Mrs. Bink asks. Ha! Annie says Mrs. Bink is still among the living, zombie-like as some of them (ahem, Asslee, ahem) may be. "Am I under arrest?" Mrs. Bink asks, seeing Roxanne in her cop uniform. Psst! Roxanne? Yeah, it may be time to hit up the nearest Big K and buy yourself a new outfit or two. Your uniform's gotta be getting pretty rank by now. "Get dressed!" says Ruthie. Asslee says something, but I am no longer paying attention to her. If I pretend she isn't on the show, maybe she'll just go away. Annie informs Mrs. Bink that she's eloping. Mrs. Bink's mouth drops open in an expression that is supposed to be delighted surprise, but really should be horrified shock at the absolute and unmitigated gall of these people to break into her house with police approval and make her get married to her totally lame boyfriend. I can't believe this show.