On a dark street corner, Ruthie runs to the car and tells her older brothers that Burt's pretending to be sick. She doesn't care, however, because she only asked him out in order to find out about Robbie's woman. Next we see Simon introducing Deena and her date Peter to his siblings. "Simon, where's your date? I thought we were double dating!" says Dense Deena. Simon tries to play it off like his alleged date stood him up, but Deena realizes what's going on and calls the whole thing off apologetically. My drunken apartment neighbors scream like banshees and laugh like hyenas. I open my door and shout, "Get thee heavenwards, family-valueless heathens!" I throw a brick wrapped in a Barry Watson poster through their window, then come back inside in time to hear Deena lisp "Happy Valentine's Day" to heartbroken Simon. He acts like he doesn't care for the sakes of Matt and Ruthie. "Face it, we're losers," says Ruthie. It's about time someone on this show admitted the truth.
The Camdens wear fake smiles as Annie forces them to applaud the twins' ruining of their cake. Then Annie shrewishly tells her teenaged offspring to "go forth and have [their] holiday fun." Everyone looks at Robbie expectantly through several pregnant pauses. He merely tells them that he won't stay out too late. Then he's gone, and Lucy's taking off her bathrobe to reveal her cheap red dress. Her siblings give her the thumbs-up, and she goes to meet Jeremy with her parents at the door. Ruthie declares that Lucy isn't a loser like the rest of them. She's wrong, though.
At the door, suave-ass Jeremy kisses Lucy's cheek. He gives flowers to Annie and candy to RevCam. Then he gives them assurances and his cell-phone number. They are, of course, impressed as hell. Annie can't get Robbie out of her mind, though. She and RevCam let on that they share the same suspicion about Robbie's date. They don't say her name, but I figure that they're talking about the bad, bad girl with whom Robbie was living. I can't remember her name, though. I only remember the faux leopard skin. Poor Robbie.