As Roxanne and RevBong enter, they're feeling euphoric about their fight. Woo hoo! All right, losers! I don't care if you think you won; you're still losers to me. Chandler asks Roxanne, "Are you gonna be okay, or should I bring a bucket in?" You know, if Roxanne's not gonna use that bucket, would you mind leaving it with me? This episode's not going down real well, and since we still have the wedding to get through, I have no reason to think it's going to get any easier.
Quick -- pass the bucket now! It's Aunt Julie, and she's just as annoying as ever. It doesn't help any that she's with Uncle Hank. When the irksome couple mention that their kids have the flu, Roxanne goes into meltdown mode and starts accusing Hank of passing on his germs when she gave him a ride the night before. So there actually was a point to that scene! Not much of one, but still, more than there is to many scenes on this show. I'm not sure why Roxanne is still passing her germs around to all the unsuspecting wedding guests, but why should she bother to be thoughtful or considerate? Nobody else ever is in Glenoak.
Well, maybe Dopey is -- at least today. He's trying to explain to Lucy why she should get over her fears and marry Kevin, if that's what she really wants. When Matt/Barry says, "Life is short, Luce. I see it every day," I'm sure Brenda meant it to be as ambiguous as it sounded. I want to stay cynical, but I do find the scene rather moving. On the other hand, we are talking about Lucy marrying the T-1000 -- a freaky android who treats her like crap -- so I do have to take it all with a grain of salt.
When RevCam walks into the church, the congregation breaks out in applause. I'll bet Lucy is spittin' mad that anyone would detract from her day like that. Simon leads Annie to the front pew and then joins the abusive rust-bucket at the altar. Gabrielle calls out to Annie, "Aren't you going to thank me?" She's referring to the fact that she brought Annie's father to Glenoak. Annie hugs her dad, which is also quite moving, considering that the actor who played him, Graham Jarvis, died recently. It's so rare that I find anything on 7th Heaven even remotely poignant that I tend to be bowled over when it actually happens.
Seeing the twins as ring-bearers, or Mary and Ben walking down the aisle together, doesn't exactly bring tears to my eyes, though. I can't believe Mary couldn't take two or three minutes to change out of her ugly JetBlue uniform into something even vaguely more appropriate. Hey, and speaking of inappropriate, she and Ben are using their walk down the aisle to engage in some flirty banter that might make for a good scene if it were written by someone other than Brenda. I have nothing against people talking to each other as they walk down the aisle, mind you, but I do think it's pretty funny that Mary obviously doesn't find her sister's wedding interesting enough to hold her attention. To be honest, I don't either, but I'm not part of the happy CamClan. We learn that Robbie has moved to Florida, which is something Mary didn't know. We also learn that Ben went down to Florida to visit Mary last week, although he missed her because she was in Buffalo then. Please, Brenda, don't let Mary get back together with either of these guys. Discover a new state, if you must, that could provide beaux for Mary -- fresh ones that she hasn't already broken up with twenty or thirty times. And whatever you do, please, please don't bring Wilson back. There. Now all I need are two other people to back me up, and Brenda will have to listen.