7th Heaven
We Do

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Cate: C- | Grade It Now!
We Do

Back at the CamPound, Eric answers the phone with a frantic, "Just tell me you're coming, no matter who you are." Ew. Is that how he always answers the phone? Or does Stephen Collins think he's a character in one of his "erotic thrillers"? I thought that usually when people make perverted phone calls, they call other people and try to stay anonymous. Oh, and it's Uncle Hank. That's certainly not very erotic or thrilling. He's calling to tell Eric that his stupid offspring will be missing the wedding because they're sick. Hank probably won't make it either, since he's waiting for one of his patients to give birth. As he puts it, "I can't do a caesarean just because I want to see Lucy and Kevin get married." Can't he? Because a storyline like that has Brenda written all over it. Hank informs us that the Colonel and Grandma Ruth consider Gabrielle to be their wedding gift to Lucy and Kevin. Ha! They must really hate Lucy. A lot. Even though Gabrielle is pretty cool, that's still an even worse gift than a Royal Doulton figurine, or a cedar plaque for the bathroom that says, "If you sprinkle when you tinkle, be a sweetie and wipe the seatie."

Annie is spending her daughter's wedding day…Windexing the doors? There honestly aren't any better ways for her to use her time? When Annie sees Lucy coming down the stairs, she gets The Vacuous Stare Of Flashbacks on her face, and the clips begin. Annie's not flashing back to her own experiences with Lucy, though. Not surprising, since I've never thought of them as being particularly close. No, Annie is envisioning scenes between her mother and Lucy, such as the one in which her mom teaches Lucy how to make cookies. Hey, I think that might be the first time ever that we've seen Lucy raise a finger to help out in the kitchen. Annie admits that she's missing her mother, and Lucy launches into some bullshit about how Grandma is "a part of [them] always." I know this is supposed to be a nice moment, but sentiments like that have always creeped me out. What is she even talking about? Things perk up a bit when Lucy says she will be wearing her grandmother's locket as her "something old." I really don't need to hear that her "something blue" is a garter. I'm sure it's one of those really overpriced, useless things you buy at bridal shops, and I can only hope that during the hideous wedding reception, Kevin will not remove it from her thigh with his cyborg teeth. Lucy is a trifle apprehensive that having the wedding with so many of the guests missing will make her look "desperate." Isn't it a little late to be worrying about that? I mean, I think her storylines from the past two seasons have pretty effectively taken care of that already. Annie really doesn't want Lucy to postpone her wedding, since she's worried that any delay could cause RevCam to back out of returning to the church. That must make Lucy feel very special and cherished on this, her wedding day. As Lucy leaves, Annie puts The Vacuous Stare Of Flashbacks back on her face as she remembers giving Lucy her mother's locket.

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7th Heaven




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