7th Heaven
When Bad Conversations Happen To Good People

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Bad Happens

Annie's walking the twins out of the bathroom, which leads to many questions. Such as "what were they all doing in there?" or "can't the twins go to the bathroom individually?" as well as "do they really, at four years old, still need their mother to help them use the toilet?" They meet up with Asslee, who says she set the table and asks if there's anything else she can do. Ruthie comes along and orders Asslee to walk the twins downstairs. The twins ask if anyone would like to see their "underwears" before they go. Everyone laughs politely and tries not to sound too concerned about the twin's obvious, and numerous, developmental disorders. Asslee leads them downstairs. Annie starts ranting about her stupid fucking cookie jar and how the twins won't confess to breaking it. Ruthie makes some faces. Annie asks what she wants; Ruthie says she just wanted to ask Annie to talk to Peter about his abandonment issues, but now that she thinks about it, he may not want anyone else to know, so maybe Annie shouldn't say anything. Way to use your boyfriend's semi-legitimate, and fairly serious, fears to cover up for your cookie jar breaking spree, you evil troll. Ruthie walks away, leaving Annie to make a "suspicious" face. She kind of looks like The Joker.

Lucy's pacing The Treehouse. The phone rings, and Lucy starts yelling at it, because she's crazy. The machine picks up after one ring, and Mindy starts leaving a message about how she was wondering if Lucy could meet her for dinner even though Kevin has to work. Lucy grabs the phone and screams, "Wheredidyougetthisnumber?" Mindy's like, "Uh…information?" She's also sitting on a bench on the Promenade, like, find somewhere new to hang out, Mindy.

Chandler and Peter eat pizza. Peter starts telling his sob story about how if anything happened to his mom, he'd be an orphan. Chandler looks at him. "What? I would," Peter snaps. Hey, Peter, maybe Chandler is thinking about how one of his parents is actually dead, and recently so, and maybe you should be a little more sensitive. Or perhaps he's mad at Peter for eating the last slice of his delicious, delicious pizza. Chandler stammers out that he hasn't talked to Paris about this yet, but how would Peter feel about them getting married "some time in the distant future?" Yes, becoming a father figure to a sad child is a great reason to get married, Chandler. It's right up there with losing your virginity. Peter grins and practically leaps over the table to give Chandler a big hug. Chandler tells Peter that he loves him. How healthy.

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7th Heaven




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