Oh, no. Simon. He tells SuperMom that his Home Ec class isn't working out. SuperMom: "Sometimes life is harder than we think it's going to be." Oh, yeah -- that one's goin' on my yearbook page. Not.

Anyway. The doorbell rings, and RevCam opens the door and finds RyGuy and Jessica standing there. You see, Jessica has been worried all her life that she would never find someone who loves her, and Ryan does love her ("Yeah, even if he DOES show it with his fists." -- Kra Mehr), and that "under the circumstances, I don't think you're the right minister to marry us." RevCam: "What?!" RyGuy: "You have a problem with the way I love Jessica. Jessica doesn't." Shut up, Ryan. Go find a time machine and join us in the latter half of the twentieth century.

Friday, 7:57 AM. Breakfast-time! Woo-hoo! Annie is preparing…dinner. Um, what? The phone rings, and it's Sergeant Michaels for The Rev, who has just entered. As he answers the phone, the doorbell rings, and SuperMom runs to the front door. Annie opens the door to reveal "Mrs. Ryan Tomlin, Senior," RyGuy's mom, who needs to speak with RevCam posthaste. Annie runs to get him in the kitchen, where he has just gotten off the phone with The Sarge. Apparently, Chickenhead's dad checks out. AWESOME! ROCK! That RUUUUULLLLLLEEEESSSS!

Ahem.

Annie: "Ryan's mother is in your office. She asked to speak to you." RevCam: "Well, this should be interesting." SuperMom, matter-of-factly: "Yes, it should be." What the hell -- are they robots now? Affirmative.

The conversation that RevCam has with Mrs. Tomlin is very long and repetitive, and it's difficult to take quotes from it out of context, so allow me to paraphrase. Mrs. Tomlin suspects that RevCam never wanted to marry the young couple, and RevCam admits that. She calls Jessica, and tells her to come over to Casa Camden, but not to call Ryan. Mrs. Tomlin then reveals to RevCam that she has filled the role of an oppressed housewife ever since she got married. Because of this, she feels that Ryan inherited his father's traditional attitude, and she thinks Jessica deserves better.

8:47 AM. School-time! Woo-hoo! SuperMom is dropping Ruthie off at school. As Ruthie gets out of the car, SuperMom says: "Remember. Mouthguard in. Chin-strap tight. Tuck the ball close to your body." Ruthie: "Huh?" Shut up, Ruthie. SuperMom: "You are playing football, not soccer, right?" Ruthie: "Who blabbed?" Apparently, no one ratted Ruthie out. SuperMom, it seems, found some sort of telltale piece of paper in Ruthie's back pocket. I don't care about this nonsense.