90210

Ep.

Title

Air/Pub'l

Grade

Author
2-10
Weecap

Honesty Is the Worst Policy

To Thine Own Self Be True - Naomi realizes that a.) she's still hung up on Liam and b.) people's lies and manipulations actually affect others. This second epiphany will come in handy soon, since the plan to take down Jen continues lurching forward. Silver urges Kelly to make eleventh-hour amends with Jackie. And Navid's mission to bring down Kris Jr. takes hold during a Meet the Parents with the Wilsons, reaping dangerous consequences for Navid.

 2009.11.17
2009.11.18		 C

Lady Lola
2-9
Weecap

Quiet Before the Storm

A Trip to the Moon - Dixon learns the truth about DJ Hottie. Navid investigates Kris Jr. and learns the truth about AAdrianna's relapse. Silver learns how truly awesome her birthday parties would have been if her mom hadn't been drunk all those years. Liam finally tells the truth about Jen. Annie, however, seems immune to truth and only dives deeper into delusion.

2009.11.10
2009.11.12		 B+

Lady Lola
2-8
Weecap

Gone Baby Gone

Women's Intuition - Dixon is a baby daddy no more. Liam realizes, with some delight, that Ivy has girl parts. Annie proves useless in every way when she believes, then dismisses speculation. Broken-hearted AAdrianna teeters on the verge of relapse. Matthews and Jen become exclusive. Shiver.

 2009.11.03
2009.11.05		 C

Lady Lola
2-7
Weecap

Candy Asses

Unmasked - Liam finds a new trick in his new surf team teammate, Ivy. Naomi treats herself to a promising relationship for once. Annie isn't yet spooked by Kris Jr., though everyone else is. Silver's spirit is broken a bit by her new role as caretaker. And Dixon is going to be haunted for years (I'd say about 18) by his entanglement with DJ Hottie.

 2009.10.20
2009.10.22		 D

Lady Lola
2-6
Weecap

Something Smells Fishy

Wild Alaskan Salmon - Naomi makes another donation to the Twisted Sister Foundation. AAdrianna overestimates Teddy and effs things up royally with Navid. Date Rape Mark's irrepressible sleaze solidifies Annie's bond with Kris Jr. Silver fulfills Jackie's dying wish, much to Kelly's chagrin. And Harry ropes Matthews into some tragically unhip male bonding.

 2009.10.13
2009.10.14		 B

Lady Lola
2-5
Weecap

Scripted Drama

Environmental Hazards - Relationships rise and fall and rise again. Navid basks in the high of his first boot-knockin'. AAdrianna struggles with feelings for Teddy. Liam gives up on Naomi. Silver drops Jackie like a hot potato. Dixon tries to rebuild his house of cards with DJ Hottie. And Annie flirts with disaster.

 2009.10.06
2009.10.08		 D

Lady Lola
2-4
Weecap

Falsies

The Porn King - Dixon masquerades as a porn king. Navid and AAdrianna do it. Teddy is a real dick. Liam wants to finish it with Jen already. Silver gets her panties in a twist about homeless rights… or something. And Annie gets up close and personal with the nephew of her manslaughter victim.

 2009.09.29
2009.09.30		 C

Lady Lola
2-3
Weecap

Yacht-a, Yacht-a, Yacht-a

Sit Down, You're Rocking the Boat - Annie forms an unholy alliance with Date Rape Mark to take Naomi's title as HBIC. Dixon lies his way into the pants of a skeezer. Teddy continues to insinuate himself into the lives of others.

 2009.09.22
2009.09.23		 D-

Lady Lola
2-2
Weecap

Sub-Text

To Sext or Not To Sext - Jen continues to be a conniving skag, wreaking extra-bonus havoc by starting the domino effect that is Annie's world crashing around her. Dixon moves on. Navid asses out.

 2009.09.15
2009.09.16		 D

Lady Lola
2-1
Weecap

Summer Winners, Summer Losers

To New Beginnings! - The kids pat themselves on the back and cheers to a new beginning free of drama, totally unaware that they're still mired in the same old crap that plagued them last year. Now with more sexting and manslaughter!

 2009.09.08
2009.09.09		 B-

Lady Lola
1-24
Weecap

This Is Your Brain on Prom

One Party Can Ruin Your Summer - Everyone officially melts down. Love triangles spring up where there were none. Crack babies scream in the night. Principals and their wives get high. Joggers get plowed down in the early morning. It's Prom, y'all!

 2009.05.19
2009.05.20		 A+

Lady Lola
1-23
Weecap

No More Feeling Uptight!

Zero Tolerance - Prom night brings West Bev to critical mass. Naomi and Ethan finally define their relationship. Silver defines herself, producing equal and opposite reactions from Dixon and Ethan. Annie's best intentions beget collateral damage. Jen proves to be the grifter that keeps on giving (or taking, as it were). And AAdrianna pops!

 2009.05.12
2009.05.13		 A

Lady Lola
1-22
Weecap

In Which Naomi Ruins Everything

The Party's Over - Naomi is an epic fail this episode -- and it's not even about her: 1.) She throws a baby shower that convinces AAdrianna to abandon the idea of motherhood; 2.) She lets her not-boyfriend Liam rip apart the fabric of society as we know it; 3.) She agrees to let her freeloading sister ultimately bilk her of $1 million.

 2009.05.05
2009.05.07		 B-

Lady Lola
1-21
Weecap

Triangulation

The Dionysian Debacle - AAdrianna and Navid continue to overcome obstacles aplenty and bring out the squee in all of us. Silver heads to her new school and get shamed and shammed by the Catholic Tracy Flick. Naomi sucks. At dating. And life. Her sister Jen sucks at Ethan, it seems.

 2009.04.28
2009.04.29		 B-

Lady Lola
1-20
Weecap

Decisions Are the Worst!

Between a Sign and a Hard Place - Donna weighs Japan vs. LA. Kelly weighs dignity vs. Matthews. AAdrianna weighs parental selection vs. parenthood. Ethan weighs do-gooding vs. truancy. Naomi weighs Annie's yammering vs. Papa Clark's self-righteous badgering. Silver weighs two more years of hazing vs. the Virgin Mary.

 2009.04.21
2009.04.23		 C

Lady Lola
1-19
Weecap

Straight Trippin'

Okaeri, Donna! - Spring Break scatters the denizens of 90210 to locations as far-reaching as Arizona (Annie and Dixon), the woods of human despair (Matthews, Ethan, Liam and Naomi), the red carpet (Donna Martin fabricates!), and a photography studio chockablock with naked men (Debbie). Debbie wins!

 2009.04.14
2009.04.15		 C

Lady Lola
1-18
Weecap

Silver Meddle

Off the Rails - Everyone looks for Silver. They find her. The end.

 2009.04.07
2009.04.08		 D-

Lady Lola
1-17
Weecap

Slow Down, Speed Up, Stop!

Life's a Drag - Annie and Ethan decline. Naomi and Liam escalate. Silver goes off the grid.

 2009.03.31
2009.04.02		 A-

Lady Lola
1-16
Weecap

Love-Hate Relationships

Of Heartbreaks and Hotels - Valentine's Day brings out the crazy in everyone. Silver gives Dixon her v-card. Ethan might be giving Annie her walking papers. And Navid finally gives in to his enduring feelings for AAdrianna.

 2009.02.10
2009.02.12		 B-

Lady Lola
1-15
Weecap

Crash

Help Me, Rhonda - There are consequences a-plenty this episode: Ethan deals with the aftermath of his car wreck, AAdrianna must make yet more important decisions about the crack baby, and Silver realizes that no woman is an island.

 2009.02.03
2009.02.05		 C

Lady Lola
1-14
Weecap

Comings and Goings

By Accident - Much hinges on auditions for the school's spring play and Matthews' surly return. AAdrianna and Dixon each make important decisions. Crazy Eyes abandons Naomi for her still philandering father. Annie finally gets little comeuppance, but we can't even enjoy it because a last-minute plot twist leaves Ethan's fate hanging in the balance.

 2009.01.20
2009.01.22		 A-

Lady Lola
1-13
Weecap

Heat & Defeat

Love Me Or Leave Me - Relationships rise and fall like a SoCal thermometer during an unseasonably hot several days. Both of the awesome couples drop like overheated flies, while the obnoxious, entitled ones stay calm, cool, collected, and stronger than ever. Stupid global warming messes up everything!

2009.01.13
2009.01.15		 B

Lady Lola
1-12
Weecap

Son Burn

Hello, Goodbye, Amen - Some (the stupid ones) open their arms to Sean, while others (Annie and Debbie) greet him with suspicion. It pays off for the latter group when the gold-digger hightails it out of town to avoid a paternity test. Also, Dixon and Silver have nothing to worry about from Dixon's cheerleader admirer… except maybe an invitation to join an all-girl softball league.

 2009.01.06
2009.01.07		 D

Lady Lola
1-11
Weecap

Family Circus

That Which We Destroy - Harry's bastard son arrives to shake things up. Dixon and Debbie fret over their roles in the new family dynamic, but Annie's too busy doing a piss-poor Naomi impression to embrace self-awareness. Naomi cozies up to a new set of backstabbing hussies and, in the process, finds herself in a sexy power play with Ozzy. Brenda rewards Kelly's earnest friendship by breaking her heart.

2008.11.18
2008.11.19		 D

Lady Lola
1-10
Weecap

You Could Crush Mint on Those Abs

Games People Play - Annie's Sweet 16 gets nearly as dramatic as an episode of that MTV show -- but only because Naomi has to find another way to make the world revolve around her. Kimberly gets some work done in Matthews' absence, despite meddling from Kelly. In news you already knew, Navid's a virgin. And Harry's bastard son shows up for approximately five seconds.

 2008.11.11
2008.11.13		 C

Lady Lola
1-9
Weecap

Pillow Blight

Secrets and Lies - Harry drops the bomb about his lovechild. Annie and Ethan go on the DL. Naomi and Ozzy get some QT. Silver hasn't yet turned in her V card. And AAdrianna tries to make Navid a champagne room VIP.

2008.11.04
2008.11.06		 B+

Lady Lola
1-8
Weecap

Dance Dance Revolution

There's No Place Like Homecoming - The school dance inspires hijinks galore and a whole lotta making out as taboo couples merge, established couples strengthen, and unlikely alliances are formed.

 2008.10.28
2008.10.30		 A

Lady Lola
1-7
Weecap

This Isn't China, It's Beverly Hills!

Hollywood Forever - Adrianna's career gets a bump when she scores a movie role, then she scores a few bumps. Naomi indulges her savior complex on Adrianna, thanks to which she may have scored herself a one-way trip to juvie. And Annie and Ethan get thisclose to relevance, albeit in the most boringly predictable manner possible.

 2008.10.07
2008.10.08		 A-

Lady Lola
1-6
Weecap

Fashion Victims

Model Behavior - Adrianna is, weirdly, the linchpin of this episode. In just 60 minutes, she manages to thwart an intervention, snag a B-movie audition, come clean to both Annie and Ty about last week's hijinks at last, and teeter dangerously close to a future as a crack whore. Also, goodbye for now, Kelly and Brenda! Come back soon!

 2008.09.30
2008.10.01		 C+

Lady Lola
1-5
Weecap

The Big Bang Theory

Wide Awake and Dreaming - The Wilson parents bang their heads against the wall over whether to trust their nubile daughter, who, for her part, thinks she's ready to bang Ty (and Dixon and Silver get pretty close, too). Adrianna, on the other hand, presumably sells her bangs to support the drug habit that gets her ousted from the school play. And guess who her understudy is? (Don't mind that sound, it's just me banging my head against the wall.)

 2008.09.23
2008.09.24		 B

Lady Lola
1-4
Weecap

Drama Geeks

The Bubble - The show flirts with awesomeness when Lucille Bluth brings her trademark sass to the West Beverly stage… but ultimately settles for mediocrity as we zoom in on the boring beginnings and beginning-agains of various couplings.
2008.09.17		 C

Lady Lola
1-2
Weecap

Pinheads

Lucky Strike - The Wilsons just want to bowl, okay? If only the drunkards' and cheaters' and porn producers' children would just leave them alone! Elsewhere Kelly and Matthews embark upon the most boring relationship ever.

 2008.09.09
2008.09.10		 C-

Lady Lola
1-1
Weecap

Same Old Zip Code

We're Not In Kansas Anymore/Jet Set - Annie and Dixon Wilson move to Bev Niner and hijinks ensue.

 2008.09.02
2008.09.03		 B

Kim