90210

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Lady Lola: B- | Grade It Now!
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Triangulation
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously: Naomi vacated the HOtel. Silver found Jesus, or at least a way to use Jesus to escape her porno past. AAdrianna and Navid got engaged!

Zoom out on a portrait of Navid and AAdrianna's wedding, complete with him clutching her low-carrying belly. Navid brings some freshly pureed carrots to AAdrianna, who turns around and has a tot in one of those marsupial slings. Bring it, flash forward! Navid is going to be the awesomest and dorkiest dad ever, as he coos to the baby, "Organic veg-tuh-bulls coming in for a wanding!" Airplane sound effects included. The baby gives a kickass "Whatever, bitch" face that immediately elevates it to, like, the best actor on this show to date. AAdrianna refers to the tyke as Hannah. Cut back to reality, where Navid thinks Hannah is an odd name for a boy. AAdrianna breaks it to him that she is not going to be a boy. He begs to differ, insisting they name their son Habib. AAdrianna thinks the kid will be immediately set up for teasing, but Navid thinks Habib is a name both masculine and sensitive, so they return to daydreaming.

In this dream, the tot is dressed up in a tiny baseball uniform -- and playing chess. AAdrianna reminds Navid that babies aren't intellectually capable of chess-playing. (Hell, I'm not, and I'm 26!) Navid insists that Habib will play chess when he's older. Baby Habib magically transforms into an eight-year-old. Mind you, he's still in the bassinette. With this added age, Habib is starting to look more like Lipnicki. AAdrianna says she just wants a healthy baby -- and even that's kind of aiming for the stars given her history of drug use. At this point, the baby has morphed back into a little girl in a pink sundress and matching bonnet.

Fantasy Navid checks his watch and says they need to get to school. AAdrianna asks who will take care of Hannah. Like it's the most obvious thing in the world, Navid says his parents will. Cue his parents eagerly running in with baby bottles and toys. AAdrianna steps away from the fantasy to remind Navid that his parents don't technically even know yet that she's pregnant. She suggests he tell them by himself, but he seems pretty assured of how the news will go down. He lays out their response step by step, including explosive anger, crying, America-directed hate, and finally joyous acceptance. AAdrianna wonders if Navid's mom will be concerned that he's raising another man's (crack) baby, but Navid says she'll be cool with it because she was raised by her step-father. They smooch blissfully.

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90210

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