Episode Report Card
Lady Lola: D | Grade It Now!
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Previously: Fuckers (Teddy), fucking around (Liam) and fuck-ups (both of the texting variety: Silver and Ethan's secret romance, Annie letting herself get photographed naked). Oh yeah, and Annie killed that guy that time.

All of West Bev has convened in the quad for the activities fair. Naomi shoves her cleavage into some tech dork's face to see whether she can send a text message anonymously. Her devious plan is interrupted by Silver and AAdrianna. They spot Liam in the distance ("Douchebag alert!") and switch directions abruptly, which points Silver's eye in the direction of Dixon checking out the Kabbalah Club booth. Of course West Bev has a Kabbalah Club. She is convinced their love is too special to end so suddenly. The girls advise her to give things a week to let Dixon calm down.

Across the lawn, Navid is trying to drum up interest in the Blade. Dixon comes over to see if Silver is still staring pathetically at him. He launches into a speech about how it's totally over. New year, new Dixon. But Navid is too distracted by BMOC Teddy ("Douchebag alert.") to really hear it. Dixon tells him to grow up and get over it. Navid returns to his snake oil selling: "Join the Blaze! We may not be popular, but we've got heart!" Ha!

Inside, Annie is moping around in the bathroom, thinking about what a worthless jogger-killer she is. Naomi stomps in and corners her: "You have no idea how hellish I'm about to make your life."

Naomi heads back outside, where Liam catches up to her. She says she doesn't have to talk to him because he hasn't contacted her for three months. He explains that he was sent to an outdoor boot camp where there were no communication devices. He apologizes. She finds it insufficient and calls him out for having sex with Annie, of all people. Of course he didn't, so he looks at her in confusion. He admits that he did cheat on her, but not with Annie. She asks who, and lo and behold! Who should drive up at that very moment. Jen. The Best Sister Ever! They drive off with the following facial expressions -- Naomi: Pouty. Liam: Forlorn. Jen: Conniving bitch. Credits.

Liam heads back home to find his mom struggling with a coffee machine and Jen sitting at his dining table. The two ladies have caucused and decided that Liam needs to stay away from Naomi. Jen plays the cloyingly sympathetic sister: "She's finally beginning to heal, you know?" Liam starts to fly off the handle, but his mom cuts him off. She promises he'll stay away from Naomi. Jen makes a swift exit now that her dirty business is done.

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