True Blood
Authority Always Wins

Episode Report Card
admin: A+ | 2 USERS: B+
YOU GRADE IT
The New Shape Of Myself

Patrick: "That has become clear in this episode, yes. It doesn't reflect on Arlene too great."
Terry: "Okay well keep that in mind as I explain to you that compared to me, Ellers is bughouse."

MAXINE'S

Jason: "Hoyt, sorry you're living in your mom's house and having to work on her sink in a tank top, but I want you to come back and live with me."
Hoyt: "That is not an appropriate request!"
Jason: "I know, Bubba, but I love you and I need everything to be okay. Come live at my house and I'll even go stay at Sookie's. Nothing weird ever happens there, it'll be fine."
Hoyt: "I'ma need you to GTFO now, okay? I am too busy navigating my gigantic sexy body around this fragile world of ours. And being a secret fangbanger and wearing makeup."
Maxine: "I must involve myself!"
Hoyt: "[More ungrateful stupid nonsense. His bad mood is so unearned and so, so obnoxious.]"

Maxine, shoving him out: "I will never forgive you for what you did to my boy, Jason Stackhouse! You are dead to me. Thank you for splitting up Hoyt and that red-haired slut, I'm gonna bake you a pie. And stay out!"

LUNA

Luna hears weird noises out of Emma's bedroom and just kind of chills out, listening and bitching, for awhile. But one the door is open, there's the cutest little wolf pup in her bed, still wearing her PJ's. I guess that's the punchline, is that she's a werewolf and not a shifter, after all? Which, if anybody gave a shit about Sam or Luna, that would be pretty interesting: The shifter couple with a werewolf in the mix, meaning they can never get away from the wolves. But who knows what is actually going on here.

TARA

Tara finally uncrosses her crazy person eyeballs and appears, much to Sookie's joy, but in the end she just announces that she will never, ever forgive either of them and then -- despite Pam's orders? -- goes zooming into the night. I can't decide which would be better: A Jessica trucker scenario where she invites people to prey on her, which would be delightful, or if she immediately just became the kind of vicious predator she's been afraid of for so long. They both have their ironies.

VAMPIRE TRIAL

The Council includes Barb from Cougar Town, the Candyman, a little boy, and some other people with character actor-type personalities. They are led by Chris Meloni, who can wear a suit like nobody's business, and there is a very long ritual with obvious ties to Catholic Mass and less obvious ties to, like, every religious ceremony because they're all the same. At one point they each get a dollop of Lilith's blood on their tongue, which one might suppose then reverse-transubstantiates into wine.

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True Blood

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