Veronica Mars
Driver Ed

Episode Report Card
admin: B- | 2 USERS: A
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Clerk. We Only Need One...

Beaver is asleep on the living-room couch in front of the TV. Big Dick and Charisma come home, and Big Dick sneaks over and them startles Beaver, causing him to spill a big bowl of popcorn all over. All Big Dick says is, "Gotcha," and then Charisma snidely adds that he needs to clean up the mess. Beaver is none too pleased, but starts to carry out the order. However, he finds a condom wrapper under the couch with "Live Large" printed on it. A lot of forum posters, no believers in deception in advertising, were thrilled. Beaver, on the other hand, just looks thoughtful.

Sheriff's office. The Woodman busts in to find Keith. He tells Keith to give him good news, and then makes a somewhat amusingly dismayed face as Lamb walks by. Heh. Keith, however, turns The Woodman down. The Woodman takes it pretty well, and shakes Keith's hand and leaves. Before Keith follows suit, however, he sees Jessie insistently pleading with Lamb to reopen her father's case, and Lamb completely blowing her off. Keith takes in the situation with a dark look on his face. That's not an expression that bodes well for his enemies.

Wallace and Jackie are waiting in the school parking lot. Jackie: "What are we doing?" Well, one of you is wrapping up a rather inauspicious debut episode full of shaky line readings and rookie overacting. But as a pair, you are, according to Wallace, "exercising patience." Across the lot, the blonde girl who was listening to that bimbo jabber about Cervando gets into her car, then gets out and reads the note stuck under the windshield wiper. Wallace waves to her and restrains Jackie from playing T-ball with the girl's head, and the girl comes over and asks if Wallace has her spark plugs. Wallace in turn asks for her insurance information; they trade up and the girl stomps off. Wallace opines that the girl won't know how to replace a spark plug, which I hope is less a sexist comment and more an indictment of this particular girl's skill set. Jackie says something about delivering her own brand of justice, only she does it with about eight different grating inflections. She's certainly got her own brand of wearing out her welcome down pat. Wallace tells her that the Spark Plug Girl isn't a student but a reporter, as we see campus security accost her and lead her away. Wallace tells Jackie that he likes his gratitude "in small doses. Spread out over time." Jackie takes the insurance info, gives Wallace a kiss, and says she may have to reevaluate her stance on nice guys. As Jackie gets into her car, Veronica appears and, none too pleased, asks Wallace who that was. When she hears Jackie's name, she responds, "Oh." Hee. But if this girl is supposed to be Veronica's bitchy rival, I think Veronica should be insulted. Then again, it's hard to act insulted when you're wearing a sweatshirt-and-cutoffs combination that brings to mind welding and Irene Cara.

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Veronica Mars

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