True Blood
Fuck The Pain Away

Episode Report Card
admin: A+ | 145 USERS: B+
Take Me To The River

Bill: "You are DRUNK. This is a violation of the highest order. People watching cannot handle seeing this happen. Think of the viewers."
Jessica: "I want to fuck! Or die! Or die while I'm fucking!"
Bill: "Honey, I know. Faerie blood makes you high. Check me out the first several seasons of this show and ask yourself if you're prepared to suck that much ass. Spoiler alert, nobody is, which is how I ended up the man you see before you."


Warlow: "On the night that your parents were killed, they were trying to kill you. I saved you..."

Sookie smacks him with a little fingerblast, and -- curious! -- across the cemetery, Bill gets knocked a few feet back. Mommy feels it when Baby gets slapped? That's awesome.

...Oh, and hey: Halfway point of the season. This is going to be a doozy, I can already tell. We're still not at the credits, even, and all this shit is going down. (Bill now has some Lilith memories of Ben in a Skyrim historical world, wearing a wig and frying her ass in a cave with faerie magicks, but let's stick to the positive.)

Jessica: "Bill, please do not go into a weird Akasha coma right now. That is the only thing that would make this worse is if you went back into mummy state on me."
Bill: "Go to bed, you'll sleep it off. I have to have more weird memories of the Olden Times. Also, I need to go see somebody real quick."


"I can't even fingerbang you without you healing sexily? Fuck this, and fuck you.
Y'all come in here, and you say you love me, and you want me, and I'm Yours, but you really just want to fuck me and own me and use my fucking blood. Fuck THAT. Fuck you, and go tell everybody fuck them too. I am not Anybody's, and not one of you motherfuckers knows the first THING about love..."

Bill shows up, of course, and she just Sookies right the hell out.

Sookie: "For FUCK'S SAKE."
Bill: "I'm not here for you, I'm here for him."
Ben: "If You're Bill Compton, I have to beat Your ass for my girlfriend. I may kill You."
Bill: "Already did. Didn't help. As your Maker, I command you to come with me."

Ben goes with him, eyes and shirt and abs still a-flutter, and a somewhat abashed Sookie puts her bomb away, wondering how this -- so quickly -- became not about her.

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True Blood




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