Outside, Roy peppers Pam with pleasant questions about her car, none of which she can answer because she's a girl, and/or doesn't care. It's a nice, relaxed moment, anyway.
Stamford. Jim tries to bluff the Herr's distribution centre by pretending to be from West Side Market, but loses it when he's asked what his store number is: "...Six?" Karen cracks up, and Jim hangs up before Herr's pokes any more holes in his story. Dammit, Jim, get your head in the game! There are chips at stake.
Stamford. Pam returns to the conference room, only to learn that she hasn't actually missed anything; Michael waited for her. Pam looks at the camera, visibly deflating. Michael starts by throwing the ball to Phyllis, but Dwight, sitting next to her, snatches it away before she can catch it and tells the tale of having been a twin, but then "resorbed" the other fetus in the womb: "Do I regret this? No. I believe his tissues made me stronger. I now have the strength of a grown man and a little baby." What about its weaknesses? I wouldn't be surprised if Dwight's skull still has a soft spot. Michael tries to move the share to Stanley, but Stanley flatly refuses, so Michael tries Pam instead. She offers up the story of her aunt, "this amazing female boxer," who was paralyzed in a bout. The camera cuts over to Ryan, who narrows his eyes in recognition. Pam goes on: this aunt ended up asking her manager to remove her breathing tube. You know, I've never seen Million Dollar Baby, and now I know I really don't need to. Apparently Michael hasn't seen it either, and is as moved as you would expect a simpleton like Michael to be by the work of a simpleton like Paul Haggis. Anyway, Ryan motions for Pam to toss him the ball, and tells the group about going on safari with his family in Africa, where his cousin Mufasa was killed by wildebeests. Michael encourages him to go on, but Ryan says that, to tell the whole story, it would take him about an hour and a half. He doesn't say that it would also be interrupted by several cloying musical numbers.
Kevin goes next, and as he talks about throwing a big party one weekend, only to suffer the loss of his Uncle Bernie and then pretend he was still alive, Ryan and Pam roll their eyes that Kevin would pick a movie that Michael not only would have definitely seen but is probably planning to screen for the next Movie Monday. Michael gets mad that Kevin would ruin this moving session for everyone: "Do you think this is a game?" Phyllis: "Well, there is a ball." Stanley gets up to leave, but Michael insists that they're not done: "The guy who had my job is dead, and nobody cares! And he sat at my desk!" Toby kindly says that he understands that Michael may not have realized until today that death is a part of life (I'm paraphrasing), but that just today, Toby saw a bird fly into the glass doors downstairs, and died, and that there was nothing to be done. Michael, as he does, feverishly seizes on this...