Veronica Mars
Plan B

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admin: A | 8 USERS: A+
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What A Non-Incorporated Municipality Without Pity Can Do

Beaver and Mac stare up at the Sadie Hawkins banner, and he sighs loudly. She asks about the particulars of his damage, and he says dramatically that he's just standing there wondering why Mac's ashamed of him. Like Dick's continued emasculation would somehow have an effect on Mac. "...It's the age thing," he continues. "Me and my full blush of youth, you and your advancing years..." She smacks him, well done Mac, and reminds him that she's standing in the hallway holding his hand, and calls him a "dorkwad." They are so lame and made for each other. Beaver looks up, all yearning, and requests her continuing approval and love like a kicked puppy. Mac: "Fine. You wanna go to the big dance, Cassidy?" In a very funny, very dorky voice. Man, I thought -- knew -- I liked Tina Majorino and Amanda Seyfried, but have you seen Big Love? That show rocks so fucking hard, and they're right there in the middle, both of them blowing it out of the water. It is so great that Majorino, especially, is getting recognition. "Yes," Beaver replies, "and if it blows as much as I think, we can cut right to the good stuff." Mac reacts with fake surprise, because she knows how it is, with the sex and the high school of it all, and Beaver laughs fakely. "Pizza Quest '06! Get your mind out of the gutter!" That's...not funny. Considering he led her directly toward a place that was specifically not pizza, it's kind of like he was lying in wait around the "you're a whore" corner of the conversation. We'll see.

Veronica pursues Logan across the front area of the school, but he protests that he can't be late for his first day with Woody Goodman. He tells her to call the County Courthouse, unnecessarily reminding her that he's the Honorary Assistant Deputy "Mayor" or whatever. She says that she has something she needs him to do, and he responds, "Ask not what Logan can do for you..." Veronica and I agree that the whole poli-sci quote thing is going to get really old soon if he keeps it up, but in a tone that kind of redeems it. Very much in line with the whole "daily quote" thing, which of course is my personal touchstone for the character. "Let me know," Logan grins. "Until then, I'll be speaking softly and carrying a big stick." Aww, Logan just can't quit with his best friend. So sweet. Veronica grabs his keys, and not his nuts like I would have, and asks him again about Felix's murder. For which he's still the guy: "The whole 'Dead Felix" business has lost its intrigue. When something stops being important to me, my memory gets a little fuzzy." He waits a beat, but you know what's coming: "...Wait, who are you?" Veronica explains to him (and me) in small words, again, what's on the table right now: "If Thumper did do it, he's going to get away with killing Felix, framing [Logan], taking over the PCH Bike Club, and cornering the high-school drug trade." She thinks a moment and drives it home: "We should invite him to speak at FBLA!" Logan reiterates that it's not his problem, and she asks if he's remembered anything about the real, not fake, 911 caller. He thinks, and then snots fakely: "Mexican dude. Driving a truck. Bumper sticker. 1-800-EAT...something..." Veronica gives him his keys back, but if you know Logan, you know he's realest at his fakest: he takes off, shouting over his shoulder that it was a San Diego Seafood truck, and that he'd probably know the guy if he saw him. Veronica stands there, remembering the Fake Logan rule once again.

Woody Goodman. Still giving me the all-over shudders. He says to his telephone that "Father Fitzpatrick has blown this way out of proportion," and mentions the facts in favor of incorporation, again: more law enforcement immediately, the eventual bounce-back of property values...And then Furonda from America's Next Top Model shows up, ranking somewhere between Kim and Naima on the ANTM-Suck Scale, but to be fair, she's a lot closer to Kim. She also looks way less weird, prettier here than she usually does on her show, and that's an accomplishment. I wonder if she gave Woody a list of how she would and would not prefer to be treated, on her first day. I wonder if he did something gross with that list, because all I see when I look at Woody is creepy stuff I don't even know about because I don't spend a lot of time on the internet. Furonda tells Woody that the intern has arrived, and he asks her, "Beverly," to get some photographers or whatever for the PR.

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Veronica Mars

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