The Voice

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American Gladiators

Now it is Team Blake's turn. He has selected Patrick Thomas and Tyler Robinson. They are singing "Burning Love" by Elvis. Tyler is the adorable ginger who is openly gay, which is a nice change from, say, Adam Lambert. See? This show is different from Idol! Blake introduces the two boys to Reba and they get down to work making "Burning Love" into a heartfelt divaesque ballad filled with runs and many, many extra notes. They practice for a bit, and Blake reminds us that Tyler can sing anything, but maybe should rein it in a bit, while Patrick is a trained singer with a lot of heart. Then it's competition time. Carson's emaciated frame (dude, eat a cheeseburger, unless you've been on Atkins for the last five years, then eat some bread) announces the contenders, and the boys enter the ring. Patrick takes the first verse and sings the heck out of it and manages to make googly eyes with Christina, who is wearing a skintight leopard print, so she's kinda asking for everyone to make googly eyes at her. Tyler takes the second verse and sings his heart out, too.

Reba and Blake debate the merits of each singer while the other judges say some useless gobbledygook about how "they rocked it" and "they gave it their all." Reba says she doesn't want to be in Blake's position right now, but she probably meant she didn't want to sit in his big old chair, because the red really clashes with her hair. Blake gives Tyler some compliments about following direction really well, but ultimately gives the round to Patrick. I'm not sure Blake Shelton was prepared to mentor an untrained, bearded gay hipster dude when he could make his life easier and choose an already-trained, vanilla pudding pop country singer.

Adam Levine and his beard select Casey and Tim to sing "Leather and Lace," which was sung by Stevie Nicks as well as Will Ferrell Tim reminds us, first, that he exists, and that he has a ton of records out. To be clear, he's the guy that Adam thought was a girl. Casey, the girl who was chosen in the sloppy-seconds round of the blind auditions, hasn't been singing that long. That and some hair products are the main difference between these two competitors. The duo heads to the practice room to meet their "advisor," Adam Blackstone. They sing for a while and then, as is apparently the formula, we quickly cut to Adam telling us what he likes about each of the performers, "She's a powerhouse!" "He's talented!" and then we cut to them rehearsing in the boxing ring while Adam does his best Paulie Pennino impression and offers coaching tips from the sidelines.

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The Voice




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