I've had both happen; waaaaaay less creepy when the dude is actually gay. Don't know how that works out, but it's the serious truth.
Ryan: "What am I going to do with the award? Nothing. I -- I don't know what I'm going to do. That's the least of my...concerns right now."
Oscar yawns (See? He knows what I'm talking about) as Michael presents the "Tight Ass" award to (the violently horrified) Angela. "Not only because she's everybody's favorite stickler, but because she has a great caboose!" And if nobody claps, is it because they're too tired, too creeped out, or two bored to follow the train of thought? Or all three and many more? It's a clever award, considering Angela's (a) totally cute and (b) admittedly a "stickler," to say the least. I don't know. There's something very "Toby Do Your Job" about all of these awards. If Pam had any ambition, she'd put together a "highlights" tape for Toby of this shit. Tight Ass Angela stares across the restaurant at Michael, arms folded, and doesn't move. "So...come on...down!", he says, hesitantly. And she responds with a firm, awesome "No."
Jim watches Pam giggling, buried in a pile of empty glasses, upon which she's sipping still. "I think those might be empty?" he suggests. Not that she's ever heard him say this before, like in every single episode ever. Not that she knows what "empty" really means. Not that she'd believe him if she heard him say it. She laughs and tries to explain: "No, no! Because the ice melts, and then it's like ... second drink!" (Cute or depressing? I don't know. It's a great line, wonderfully delivered; but in context? Depends on if you're the second drink; depends on if you're just mostly melted ice by now.) Jim's amused: "Second drink?" She laughs adorably, and he joins her. Second drink it is, but swaying isn't dancing.
Michael presents the "Spicy Curry" award to Kelly Kapoor. That's the whole joke. "What's that mean?" she asks. And asks, and asks, to the point where it comes back around to funny. The statue is also in the shape of a bowler, and not a businessman, because they ran out of businessman statuettes, and it goes on and on and finally ends on Michael just shaking his head: "Just sit down, Kelly." Funny, but single-layer funny. "Try my googi-googi" icky-funny; not Wizard Of Oz/Bend It Like Beckham funny. She wrote the episode, she gets a pass.
Michael sweats and chugs bottled water, swearing to us that he now knows "what Bob Hope was going through when he performed in Saudi Arabia." I don't...I plead the Levinson-Gould on that one. Michael tries to give us some kind of effed-up speech about the suckitude of Dwight, who's being kind of awesome this episode, but then Dwight starts the next music cue early, so Michael bitches about that and then runs back out "onstage" and...starts singing "Tiny Dancer." Which normally would earn a whole lot of shit-talking from yours truly, but the end of the episode kind of makes that impossible, so never mind. "You have won a tiny Dundie..."