True Blood

Episode Report Card
admin: A+ | 1 USERS: A-
Vendetta For V
In a hurry? Read the recaplet for a nutshell description!

Lorena, Bill and Russell come giggling through the front door of Chez Gay, still just covered in Goner Rita's blood from the towncar and looking pretty much demented. They are surprised to see Talbot sniffing around Tara, who is still wearing that sad white shift and has the bouquet strapped to her hands. I cannot imagine Tara smells wonderful at this point, but then I don't really know what the situation is w/r/t vampires and smells. Seems like they're asking a lot, being corpses and all.

Talbot is talking to Tara like she's a dog -- "Who's a pretty girl?" -- which I guess fits his take on humans, but it's still super-creepy. Also, he calls her a "dusky little bloodbeast," which is just six kinds of offensive at once. Franklin calls Talbot the "cleaning lady" and Talbot hisses like he's about to snatch him bald, then he says "matchy-matchy," because not only is imaginary gayness his entire personality, but also it's 2001. Wait 'til he starts calling things "fierce."

Bill and Tara pretend not to recognize each other, since that's the sensible thing to do. Just kidding, Tara totally blurts "BILL?" the second she sees him, so that everybody will have an additional reason to murder her without a second thought. (I mean, on the one hand Tara does have a serious amount of shit coming at her at all times, but on the other hand she has never made what you would call a good decision.) And of course Bill is stagey and hilarious about how he has no ahdea who Tara is or why she is there or whatever. Everybody wonders, Tara being Franklin's girlfriend, why then she is tied to a parlor chair with decorative items duct-taped to her body.

Franklin, as a lunatic of outrageous proportion, is not interested in explaining why being His involves using every possible knot from the Webelos Handbook, and spirits a very paternal/affectionate Russell away to the study so that he can tattle on Bill and we can see what Franklin is actually like when he's not being menacing. (The answer is: Amazing.) Talbot prisses about him bringing work home and Russell barks, "Darling? King," pointing at himself.

Tara, all alone in the parlor with only her dying ugly flowers for company, asks Bill for a little help, but he's crazed in the eyes and seemingly uninterested in her plight. Although you know if they were all alone and not in the middle of an Abercrombie & Fitch he'd do just like Sookie and totally ignore how tied up and beaten Tara is, and just start asking about Sookie and did she mention me and how's she doing and what did she have for breakfast.

Instead, Bill goes upstairs and Lorena follows, still doing that pathetic post-breakup thing every single person alive can be caught doing where you're like, "So we're back together, right? Because you were really nice to me at that party the other night," and the person has to go, "I was clearly drunk, and grooving on life." This will not, in fact, disrupt Lorena's belief that they are boyfriend and girlfriend and that soon they will wed, because poor Lorena.

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True Blood




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