Top Chef

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Gone Fishin'

As Antonia, Tiffani, and Jamie are joking about how big of a fish they're going to catch, Dale has already hooked a fish. As they reel it in, Dale dedicates it to his father and the other team looks a little worried. Not that worried, though. They have five hours and they're like five minutes in.

Over on the other boat, there haven't been any bites yet. Angelo, as is his wont, is overmanaging the process. Mike is holding the pole, and Angelo keeps point out spots where he saw fish jumping. Um, that doesn't help. They all keep talking about how they're totally going to catch a fish, but no one is catching a fish.

Back on the successful boat, Antonia catches a fish and squeals like she's 11 and just won backstage passes to see Justin Bieber. What I really love is that Carla is celebrating with the other team, because it's fun, and seriously, who cares? The ladies all do a little "Antonia" dance. And everyone on that boat just keeps catching fish after fish after fish.

So how's the other boat doing? Not good. They're worried because they know that they need five to seven big fish to feed the crowd. Angelo asks Mike if he needs a break from manning the pole. I bet Angelo asked that every three minutes. You know it's killing him to sit back and do nothing.

The two boats pass near one another and the loser boat finds out that the winner boat is winning. The winner boat makes fun of the loser boat's fishing technique. This is all very entertaining but I wish we knew what happens if one team just doesn't catch any fish. Will it affect the judging if they have to make vegetarian dishes or whatever? Because otherwise, the stakes are pretty low and we're spending a lot of time watching people wiggle fishing poles around for no reason. Marcel interviews that if you don't catch fresh fish, you might as well pack your knives. Okay, but they're only sending home two people and there are three people per team, so how does that work? And would they really send someone home for something that is really totally chance? I don't get it.

There are two hours left in the fishing period. Finally, Fabio and Mike both get bites on their lines. That changes their luck, and the fish are being hauled in fast and furious. Marcel gloats that he's caught two striped bass himself. Tiffany gets a bite and Mike and Angelo have to kneel down in front of the seated Tiffany to help her hold the pole. So of course, Mike makes gross jokes but Tiffany keeps her cool. I get why she would be annoyed, and Mike is gross, but I don't know that I could refrain from making pole jokes in that setting. I've already had to hold back from about three "That's what she said" jokes in this recap alone. Blais also laughs that he and Fabio are "sitting in Marcel's lap, holding his rod." See? It's not possible to avoid making that joke.

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